Poetic Genesis

O-M-Geesh

2011-06-03T06:09:00.000-07:00

I've teeter-tottered on whether or not I'd write this for...YEARS! But my how the time flies and things don't change. So I'm just gonna write it, gosh darnit.

PEOPLE NEED TO STOP GIVING UNSOLICITED OPINIONS!! PERIOD.

There, I said (wrote) it. It's out. I'm sick and tired of people giving me their opinions when I didn't ask for them. It's different when I say, "hey, this is what I'm going through," and then an opinion follows. But when you just downright come out the side of your neck to tell me to do something about MY life, then you just opened the flood gates for my Aquarian ways. Honeys, sarcasm is a second skin on me and just because it's funny, doesn't mean I don't mean it. :) I'm sure I'm not alone. People who mind my business because they feel they can, irk the hell outta me. People who ASSUME I value their unsolicited opinions makes me feel like someone just gave me a wedgie...and no one likes those. The only thing those opinions make me do is stay away from you...cause obviously you don't know jack about me.

Now, nothing has happened of late because I'm in great company. But it has taken a while to get here and before anyone crosses that line again, I wanted this to be known. Everybody has a pet peeve and this is my second. I won't even get into my first because I'm an air sign and sometimes I just don't make sense to people.

And if you're wondering, I don't give an opinion if I am not asked specifically. And actually, if I'm asked specifically, I'm gonna tell you to do what you feel you must do because I'm aware that I don't know ALL of the situation to make a very informed opinion on it. That's just me...take me as I am...flaws and all. :0)

Stay peace!

She Asked Him To What??

2011-04-26T06:24:00.000-07:00

Yeah, if you didn't see it, picture this...

Chrissy's not exactly on one knee, but she expresses her love for Jim Jones and asks for his hand in marriage. My first thought: WOW (in my Flavor Flav voice). My second thought: WOW (in my feminist voice). My third thought: fadamn...sigh (in my own voice). By the time the third thought crossed my mind's eye, I realized the negro didn't even respond in the negative nor affirmative. Poor Chrissy....my ass.

Quite a few years ago, I would have given Chrissy a high five, a gone girl, and a hallelujah. But today, all I saw was DESPERATION. IMHO (In my humble opinion), I don't think it's good to ask a man to marry you. Now, my opinion is mirrored by one of my male friends who thinks it's "weird" and prefers the more traditional route of marriage proposals. He wants to be okay with being hitched, wants to propose romantically, and wants it to be the right time. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say he would probably ask her parents permission first. I didn't ask him that question but it's on my to-do list (wink). Another (young) male friend also described a woman asking a man to marry him as "weird." I'm gonna say weird is the word of the day for this topic from the male perspective. And I must mention, a few of my brothas didn't even want to answer the question. I guess it was "weird" for them too.

My sista-friends viewed the topic all over the map. One sista, who is recently engaged, stated, "I love my dude more than anything, but if he didn't ask me, there was no way I was asking him. It takes a man to truly search his soul to even ask her the right way. And for a woman to beat him to it...how do you know if he is ready or if you forced it?"

Another sista doesn't think there's anything wrong with a woman asking a man to marry her. She stated, "if you feel that's what you want to do, I don't think it's important who asks. What I think is more important is why you are asking?" This sista made me pause with that question. The only thing I kept repeating to myself was, "why are YOU asking?" See, 'cause I'm still not convinced it's okay. Or may it's not okay for me, as another one of my sistas put it. This may be closer to my truth. No, I don't think it's right for a woman to propose to a man. Yes, I think it's a desperate move. But, do what you do, Boo! I just can't see me doing it.

Now, on to a different perspective that may have very well rounded out my overall opinion. A sista told me that, "I am in no way a timid or docile woman in terms of my behavior in a relationship. But I would never ask a man to marry me. To do that deprives the man of his chase which is something I believe is very important to him. It's a part of his fiber whether he knows it or not." Hmmm BOOM!! What you know about that? I agree with her. Men love ego strokes, and what bigger stroke can he give himself with a marriage proposal, on his terms, and a tear-filled "YES!"

Then I got to wondering....what would ultra-feminist think? Would this be looked at as a symbol of 'yes, we can, as women, do this?' (Punctuation is ALL wrong in that but, it's my blog...lol) Would this be considered one of the 'rights' they'd fight for? I don't know, cause this feminist, I guess, it not that feminist.

As little girls, we are 'fed' the fairytale marriage proposals. When we start getting into a serious relationships where we want to be with that man forever, getting down on one knee isn't in our peripheral. We don't envision choosing the perfect ring for him. We don't think about how to make the perfect proposal to him. But, truthfully, if some of us have thought about it, I'm sure most of us have coward away from it at the very thought of being criticized for asking him first.

Guess I'll be spending the day dialoging about this subject with different people. My hopes? I want to 'feel' a happy medium between it being "weird" and it being "wrong" (cause I don't think I can be convinced that it's alright).

OK! Now for the juicy stuff (if you're a viewer)...

Jim Jones momma was pissed, wasn't she? LOL!! Chrissy better get a bigger bed cause momma is gonna be all up in their business! Do you think she was wrong for being upset about the engagement. And why do I suddenly miss Frankie (Keyshia Coles mother) when I see his momma?? Seeing her also makes me wanna 'phone home' (wink...lol) Things that make you go hmmm...

Fabolous' *iwishedhespelledthisright* girlfriend, Emily, needs to let the negro GO! Not only did he not show up for the family photo shoot, but he didn't even answer the phone when she wanted help calming their son down! Not to mention the stuff we already know, like he doesn't 'claim' her in public. She's just his stylist. Psssh! I wish a negro would. She need to grow some, take her kids, and dip!

Somoya is a hot drama mess. That's all I have to say about her. And the ex G Unit girl is over-rated to me. I can't think of her name either....that's how much matters.

Is Moshonda even really on the show? I know she had her divorce ala Alicia Keys situation going on, but I've only seen her once. What's up with that?

Now, I'm gonna watch the last recorded episode of Mob Wives. I'm SURE I have a blog for that one too! Those birds really need to sit it down...lol

Stay peace!

I Don't Want To Lose You T.I.

2010-09-10T15:06:00.000-07:00

I don't want to lose you, T.I.
But I think it's time we said badbye
Good-bye implies I'll catch up witcha
Though I really don't see that in the picture....

Ok, so I'm not a rapper, but I've got potential :) Anyway...I've been wanting to speak up on this since it happened. But I didn't have time, until now, to gather my thoughts on the matter. T.I. is one of my favorite rap artists. When the news broke that he was pulled over because the cops smelled weed emanating from his car, I said, "Ooook." But when it was added that there were methamphetamines in the car, I said, "Damn," and sighed. Now, in all my fairness a drug is a drug (for all my peeps in recovery, drug counselors, etc... I get it, I know...lol), and I'm not disputing that, it's just meth, crack and all that 'seems' wayyyy worse than mary jane (I am only human).

Now, this may not seem like a big deal to anyone, but it presented a 'value' issue with me. I know I'm not in contact with T.I. or anything like that, so it's totally superficial at first glance. But I love the artist so much I said, "Self, you take pride in being fair in all situations, so will this new charge T.I. has really stop you from supporting his music?" (Yep, I converse with myself on a regular) Can you say conflicted? And this is why...

1.) I do not condone adults doing ridiculous things. And what he and Tiny (yeah, she played a part in it as well) were into was ridiculous.

2.) After his very engaging show, T.I.'s Road To Redemption, I really thought once he finished his prison sentence, he was going to show us all those things he told us. I was a true T.I. cheerleader. I wanted him to do well. *insert sad face here*

3.) He still runs a camp to help at-risk youth (and I dig that totally!) but has presented the very worse example possible.

4.) He's great with his mouth piece. But how can you not love a man who says things like:

One's ability to change comes with one's wishes to change. If you want to change then you have every opportunity, every ability to. If you want something better for yourself then you set your mind to it and you see it and you do it.
(T.I. Jet magazine)

5.) Based on his words, T.I. wasn't ready to change and I don't like being disappointed in such a foolish way. *insert another sad face here...make that a super-sad face*

6.) Where the heck was the 'supervision' in his supervised release? Since T.I.'s been out of prison for 6 months, if someone was on their j-o-b, he should have had at least 3 urine screens. In order to be truly fair, everyone has to play their position, right? I mean, he was banned from possessing controlled substances as a condition of his 'supervised' release. And I may be minimizing what he did by writing this one, but oh, well...I'm still battling with this whole thing.

7.) He's so darn cute when he sings, "You can have whatever you like.." LOL

8.) If he was selling meth (I'm still not clear on the amount found so I don't know if he was using or selling), why be so greedy? Is street credibility that important that you make millions reciting poetry to music, making movies, etc., but still feel the need to hustle dope? Or are you that greedy? Or is it selfishness?

9.) If he was using meth...NEXT!

9.) And what about the responsibilities of fatherhood, husbandhood, brotherhood...

Well, I'm gonna chill out and let the rest of it marinate in merlot-clouded thoughts tonight. Then I'm gonna make my decision. But, my money is funny so it's not looking too good for T.I. People make mistakes, but I can only support those who show they've learned their lesson.

Stay peace

MyTimeObesession

2010-05-23T20:47:00.000-07:00

I L*O*V*E Salvador Dali.

One of my favorites, The Persistence Of Memory (TPOM), continues to pull me in. Reminding me that who I am, and who I need to be isn't the same thing as who I am, and who I want to be. And more importantly, recognizing which one of these roles is important at the time.
(FB Fam, you have to go to poeticgenesis.blogspot.com to view images)
The melting of the clocks, to me, symbolizes time we waste or let slip away. I find myself spending tons of time just looking at this. I can only hope my loose interpretation scratches the surface of its meaning. Especially since I'm a fan of simplicity (though it may not seem that way lol) But it's much deeper, I'm sure. I've also had other thoughts about TPOM. The most pressing continues to be that this represents a dichotomy of sorts. One that invades the culture of today. I like to call it 'the get up and do something' age. Picture this; Layla; a struggling single mother, takes a break while her baby naps. She sits on the couch to catch a little mid-afternoon t.v. A program catches her eye then goes to commercial break.

You too can earn a college degree in four months or less. Yes, four months or less!

She thinks the tv is talking to her then the telephone rings. It's her mom who wants to spend more time with her grandchild and offers to care for the baby anytime of the day. She thinks about it and tells mom the arrangement they have for the weekends is fine for now.

Although this wasn't the best example to have come up with (I really wouldn't entertain a degree offer like this either), it still explores the human condition to waste opportunities. Or maybe even exposes some of our inability to recognize them. What if it symbolizes how we block our own blessings by being complacent? Or maybe it's the exact opposite. What if the sliding time represents blessings given and the stable part represent future blessings...on a life continuum? Are our days really predetermined? Ahhh...what if?

This picture is one of the reasons I stopped wearing watches. Watches on my body are stress producing. I'm constantly checking the time, feeling rushed and sometimes wondering where time went when I wear them. And I don't like that feeling. Now I'll admit that I'm not the most stellar, on-time person. But I'm often the first person where I need to be :) And while I'm there, you have my full and genuine presence, patience, and participation. This picture made me appreciate time and BEING in the moment. And wearing watches takes that away from me.

What if it is exactly that? What if it represents our dis/respect of time? What if it has nothing to do with time and all to do with memories, as the title suggests. Maybe the clocks represent important events in our lives that compose our memories. What if we placed time clocks where we first kissed, graduation, marriage, baby, home, deaths, etc. would that image resemble Dali's? On a larger scale, I would hope. What if it is a reminder to make new memories?

Music isn't the only thing that can be subliminal...

Well...told you I spend a lot of time looking at this. This is a pinch of thoughts I have on it. But it all boils down to reminding me of who I am and who I need to be. I don't know how much time I have left.

What it said to me today was:

Re-flect what you want reflected. Re-evaluate often. Re-educate daily. Re-apply success. Re-purpose experience.

Stay peace

Ready, Set, Go!

2010-04-19T19:39:00.000-07:00

Spring always makes me feel a certain way. Makes me want to let some things go, allow some things to gain entrance into my life, and re-evaluate those daily constants I face. This Spring has been especially good to me. I've gained a new boss!

Yeah, I said it...

There is a good newness in something like this. And I understand the honeymoon period, but change has never been a big problem for this Aquarian (despite whatcha heard *smile*). With such a newness, I'm allowed to reinvent myself for the better. Break a few bad habits and get back to the better me...ahh motivation. The stagnation of always doing the same thing and expecting different results does a body- and mind - bad. It gives you permission to do mediocre work after so long. Kind of like that 'it's-time-to-make-the-donuts' syndrome and I absolutely HATE that feeling. The truth is, I've allowed it to a certain extent and I will own all that messiness. But when you're so stuck because there is no room for your out-of-the-box thinking, you lose pieces of yourself that make you tick. In essence, you stop being you (for a moment) and begin to conform to the norms of your environment.

Well I'm happy to say that part of me died. No longer will I accept conforming because people feel there is no other way. No longer will I pick up the pieces of another person's puzzle and try to make them fit the way they want them to. If I choose to put it back together, it's going to be in such a way that makes the situation better. It may be different, but prayerfully it's better than it was.

I remember telling a coworker that I was going to act like I didn't know how to do something because the better I did, the more work I was given.... and I was being purely defiant....because I knew I could be. What she told me was something that I continue to hear everytime my ODD (oppositional defiant disorder) starts to ack (yes ack) up.

"No matter how a person treats you, if you are going to help, do it to the best of your ability. Don't allow someone to make you dumb yourself down, you're better than that. And you aren't hurting anyone but yourself."

And she was right. Sometimes you dumb yourself down by going on with business as usual when you need to push life's pause button and change up the game. Especially when you know it's something that should be done and then don't do it. So although this newness is only in one aspect of my life, I'm taking the opportunity to press pause in other areas and roll out on different, better terms to obtain different, better results.

Stay peace!

Women's Writes

2010-01-09T18:53:00.001-08:00

Available for preorder at womenwrites.blogspot.com and Amazon.com! Available on Kindle as well! Don't miss out on this awesome collaborative effort.

did you think...

2009-09-13T15:13:00.000-07:00

freestyle..

did u think it would be that simple?
that u could walk presently in the past and it be the same
u came at a time when u were no longer valid
no longer a thought
and expected to be more

did u think you could reminisce and i'd share in your vision
a vision better suited for puppy dog eyes and similac-sweet breath
a vision so distorted u lay fetal position stung by rejection
i would dare open more than my mouth to utter no to u
i'd walk a block away just to have you in hindsight
i'd kneel each second if it would allow reality to knock some sense into u
but i don't hate that u still care
i enjoy that i've marked ur past with something so irresistible, it's hard release
yet i live in now
and u don't belong here with me
judging by ur reaction, i wonder what great Freudian theory pertains to u
i'm sure it exists
but we don't
so get over it....

2009 Genesis

Never can say goodbye...

2009-07-10T16:00:00.000-07:00

In light of losing a man who's meant so much to so many people, it's been hard to find the inspiration to write. But each time I listen to this song, I feel something amazingly liberating. We all have that one track that makes us stop what we're doing and pay attention by singing along. This track has always been that push I needed to accept things I didn't want to, believe better things were coming, and understand everything is flawed.

By the Way...

This is John Mayer on guitar at the MJ Memorial...I dig this and I still feel Michael there

Saturday Afternoon Freestyle

2009-04-25T11:26:00.000-07:00

Queen-to-be

You're my queen-to-be

Baby-fresh breath

Silky black hair

gas-induced grins

soon sprouted pearly white chiclets

I memorized every plump bump on your body

Fell asleep with Johnson & Johnson’s aroma molesting my nostrils

Hostile midnight cries invaded color-coded dreams as you communicated this newness to me

Message received

Nourished your body and your comfort simultaneously

Exhaled relief when you fell back to sleep

Hush little baby

Don’t say a word

Momma’s gonna buy you a mocking bird

And if that mocking bird don’t sing…

One turned to two

Two turned to six

Six to fifteen

Unseen

The mocking bird never sang, you said

caught in tangled branches with leaves plugging your ears

my guess is you didn’t hear it

The hum of abstinence never relayed

The buzz of danger couldn’t filter through the thickets of peer pressure where you chose to rest, relate, and release

Momma’s gonna buy you a diamond ring

If that diamond ring turns brass…

I glanced over your shoulders every 50 seconds

Watched demon’s magnetic pull suck you in

Made you see rosy paths, BLING, and [misperceived] love

I watched your glow dim as you walked backwards toward supposed paradise

Tightened reigns made of rubber bands

Stood before you, alone

The perfect clone

Though you saw old school-don’t understand-over protective-preacher woman

I still saw Queen-to-be

That nursery rhyme told of persistence

Of try until it works

Of moving forward

Despite of…

it ended

Somewhere between curiosity and old habits die hard

When making your own mistakes became settled upon

Ending with knowing you’re the prettiest baby in town

Which is certainly not happily-ever-after and certainly no where to leave you

Hooker tops and apple bottoms won’t do a thing except make you sing this song

To your pretty little problem asleep in the baby swing

Amid chocolate brown arms feeling something like daddy’s love

But you’re not quite sure ‘cause you never felt it

The more I try, you digress

Blessing me with eye rolls and puffs of the same baby fresh breath that warmed my heart

Ignoring constant pleas to secure your future by practicing Queen-to-be patience

Diva was never the route I secured for you

Lil Wayne has you in the grips of celebrity but he smokes crack and possibly licks lolli-pops

Yet you’re immune to the truth spewing from his lips

Just like the way he makes you drop it

STOP IT

Again, from the old school-don’t understand-over protective preacher woman

I can’t make you dance to India, Jill, or Erykah

Still, I spin tunes hoping you’ll recollect their significance…one day

I fed you with Maya, Saul, Paul, Langston, Genesis, grandma, grandpa, aunties, and church

But your belly’s too full of BET, MTV, and 107.9 to feast on what can make you stronger

Pac symbolically spoke of you before you were born

My unconvinced ears couldn’t understand how his musicality could become my reality

Now I see

And I breathe deeply

You’re beyond the prettiest baby, you’re much more than a big butt and a smile

I just need you to realize this

Queen-to-be

You’re caught in a cycle that mommy can’t break

For your sake

I hope you learn your lesson

Elevation

2009-04-17T21:30:00.000-07:00

The need for change bulldozed a road down the center of my mind
~Maya Angelou

For real, for real

2009-04-05T09:32:00.000-07:00

Being a parent is hard. Really hard. But one of the most challenging lessons I've learned in this role is that you HAVE to listen to your babies. Most parents, me included, grew up in the tradition of children are to be seen; not heard. But today, that is more of a cliche than a value or tradition. The kids today are demanding to be heard. And if you don't listen to them, you surely will when you are speaking with them across the table at the juvenile detention center. Or you'll listen to them when they are screaming across the room "you don't care about me."

I work with families who have teens with varying issues. But I've noticed the link that binds them together is the no-one's-listening factor. And when I speak of listening, I'm not talking about the adult-type of listening. I'm speaking of listening...for solutions. For instance, I know a teen who wants to be a journalist. But when I questioned her about her career choice, her answer was "cause everybody says I write good." So I asked her if SHE thought she wrote well. Her response: "Yeah, but I just like the way it looks."

Calligraphy classes maybe?

That's the type of listening I'm talking about. If she likes the way her writing looks, then she should have the opportunity to learn more about that. Maybe she'll stay out of trouble because she's involved in something SHE likes.

When we talk to our kids, we have to ask questions about what they are saying. Don't take anything at face value because most kids don't truly know how to verbalize their feelings. Most kids know that they are hurting, but don't understand this is regular kid-stuff.

We (parents) have got to step-up to the plate. Remember when our teachers told us to put on our listening ears? This is just a small lesson that they understood would be a valuable trait.

Why such an odd post? I'm working on a Cleveland-based project that will have parents, teachers, and communities finally listening to the generation that we will ultimately pass our problems on to. And while jotting down notes for the proposal, body of work, and possible funding sources, I became upset that something so simple is so disregarded.

Stay peace

Monday Night FreeStyle

2009-02-23T16:47:00.000-08:00

Untitled

I can't talk about her side part wrap
wore my hair that way for many years
and I can't talk about the way she changed the subject
when her neck became hot
it bothered her too much to speak
I've been accustomed to talking about her for years
how the color never changes
and she's always carrying around a faded handkerchief
dabbing at the moisture that tells her truth

And the way she dresses old-school
really didn't bother me
'til I found out I'm not easy to accept change
rather wear something clean
than new
and out of character

The cling-clank of the bangles bothered me
how she seemed to move them around
and emphasized her pointless-points
never knowing it was music to her ears
a distraction from what was happening around her
and comforted her

when i realized it was a mirror image
i suddenly began wheezing
though no asthma consumed my body
it hurt a little
okay
a lot
to realize
i'd taunted her
regularly
disregarded her feelings
daily
cruised on auto-pilot
while others captured their far-away dreams
and I sat
idly
minding her business

For some reason, Monday nights seem to be nights for reflection. I don't intend to make it so and don't know how long it will last. But I notice, Mondays speak to me in a way no other day does. I feel renewed, new, and inspired. Don't ask me where the inspiration comes from; I can't tell you. It just is. Like God; who just is. I had a client tell me she makes her day. And I guess every Monday, I'm just making mine... even if it is in the evening.

Stay peace.

Patience and tolerance...

2009-02-17T16:33:00.000-08:00

Patience is a virtue, tolerance is not. So how much can one tolerate before saying "this is it?" When saying that, does it mean the individual has given up? Or does it simply mean they've done all they could do? Ran out of options? Or realized it was a storm they could not surpass?

Writing contests

2009-02-16T08:29:00.000-08:00

I've spent a few good hours combing the net for 2009 writing contests to enter and want to share what I've found with you.

Writers Digest

Annual Writing Competition
For 78 years, the Annual Writer’s Digest Competition has rewarded writers just like you for their finest work. We continue the tradition by giving away more than $30,000 in cash and prizes!

Win a trip to New York City !

GRAND PRIZE: $3,000 cash and a trip to New York City to meet with editors or agents.Writer's Digest will fly you and a guest to The Big Apple, where you'll spend three days and two nights in the publishing capital of the world. While you're there, a Writer's Digest editor will escort you to meet and share your work with four editors or agents! Plus, you'll receive a free Diamond Publishing Package from Outskirts Press.

Entry Deadline: May 15, 2009.

For more info, click the ling ---> http://www.writersdigest.com/annual

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Random House

Delacorte Press Books for Young Readers is proud to announce the
Eighteenth Annual
Delacorte Yearling Contest for
a First Middle-Grade Novel*

The prize of a book contract (on the Publisher’s standard form) for a hardcover and a paperback edition, including an advance and royalties, will be awarded annually to encourage the writing of contemporary or historical fiction set in North
America, for readers age 9–12. The award consists of $1,500 in cash and a $7,500 advance against royalties.

All federal, state and local taxes, if any, are the winners sole responsibility. Prizes are not transferrable and cannot be assigned. NO PURCHASE NECESSARY TO WIN.

ELIGIBILITY

1. The contest is open to U.S. and Canadian writers who have not previously published a novel for middle-grade readers. Employees of Random House, Inc. and its subsidiaries and affiliates, and members of their families and households are not eligible.

2. Foreign-language manuscripts and translations are not eligible.

3. Manuscripts submitted to a previous Delacorte Press contest are not eligible.

FORMAT FOR SUBMISSIONS

1. Manuscripts should be no shorter than 96 typewritten pages and no longer than 160 typewritten pages. Include a brief plot summary with your covering letter.

2. Each manuscript should have a cover page listing the title of the work and the author’s name, address, and telephone number. The title should also appear on each manuscript page.

3. Manuscripts should be typed doublespaced on 8 1/2" by 11" good quality white paper, and pages should be numbered consecutively.The type should be easy to read, preferably 12 point.The author should retain a copy of any manuscript submitted.

4. Photocopies are acceptable if readily legible and printed on good quality white (not gray) paper. Partial or illegible entries will not be acceptable.

5. Photocopies are acceptable if readily legible and printed on good quality white (not gray) paper.

6. Do not submit manuscripts in boxes. A padded envelope will do. Please do not enclose checks for postage. The publisher is not responsible for late, lost, misdelivered, or misplaced submissions.

7. Please enclose a business-size stamped, self-addressed envelope for notification only. Please do not enclose checks for postage. Due to new postal regulations, the publisher cannot return any manuscripts. All submissions will be recycled by Random House after they are read.

MULTIPLE SUBMISSIONS

1. Manuscripts sent to Delacorte Press may not be submitted to other publishers or literary agents while under consideration for the prize.
2. Authors may not submit more than two manuscripts to the Delacorte Yearling competition; each must meet all eligibility requirements.

DATES FOR SUBMISSION

1. Manuscripts must be postmarked after April 1, 2009, but no later than June 30, 2009.
2. Send manuscripts to:
Delacorte Yearling Contest
Random House, Inc.
1745 Broadway, 9th Floor
New York, NY 10019

JUDGING

1. The Judges are the editors of Delacorte Press Books for Young Readers.
2. The judges reserve the right not to award a prize.
3. The judges’ decision will be final.
4. The editors of Delacorte Press Books for Young Readers will not be able to offer critiques of manuscripts or enter into correspondence about the manuscripts other than with the winning author.
5. Writers will be notified between July and October as submissions are evaluated by the editors. Final contest results will be announced on our Web site on or around October 31, 2009.

Click here for website ---->http://www.randomhouse.com/kids/writingcontests/

_____________________________________________________________________________________

The Federal Reserve Bank of Cleveland
(students only)

Creative Writing Contest
Money, Money, Money? - The Challenge

NEW PRIZES!!!! Read more.....

Juniors and seniors…these last years of high school are exciting—college visits and applications, prom, graduation—but they can also be expensive. How will you pay for it all?

A budget is one tool you can use. Even if your only income is an allowance from your parents, you can still get in the habit of making smart budget decisions and stretching your dollars further.

Budgeting money may be easy for some, but it takes real effort for most of us. Tell us, in a creatively written composition of your choice, how you will take charge of budgeting for additional expenses in your junior and senior years. Discuss the various expenses that you anticipate and how you plan to pay for them. How will you prioritize your expenses and handle unanticipated ones? What trade-offs are you willing to make to get what you want most? What mistakes do you hope to avoid? Be sure to include economic concepts in your composition.

Whatever you do after high school, taking control of how you handle money today will give you more choices in the future. Good luck!

Acceptable written compositions for this contest include essays, short stories, poems, and plays.
Submission Deadline: March 20, 2009
Examples of economic concepts include:

Budget a written plan for spending and saving money.

Financial Goals the desired results of one’s efforts to achieve personal economic satisfaction.

Incentive a factor that encourages people to do something; often a monetary reward or the prospect of obtaining one.

Opportunity Cost the value of possible alternatives that a person gives up when making one choice instead of another; also known as a trade-off.

Standard of Living the overall degree of comfort of an individual, household, or population, as measured by the amount of goods and services its members consume.

Website ---->http://www.clevelandfed.org/learning_center/For_Teachers/contests_for_students/2009/Essay/index.cfm

_____________________________________________________________________________________

There are many more, but I'm going to work on my chapbook now. Had some thoughts cross my cerebellum...u know how it is...

Stay peace

Black Love; my truth

2009-02-03T17:17:00.000-08:00

It's February and there are two things in the air: love and blackness. And to combine the two is like whoa!

Black love is so complex. I hear the sighs and see the head-shakes...the whispers challenging that ALL love is complex, and that may be true. But that isn't my truth.

I only know of Black love.

Love as in memories of being seated between my mommy's thighs while she greased my scalp, of being held by my father after a whipping and being told, "I'm doing this because I love you. It hurts me just as much as it hurts you."

I'm speaking of a love that makes my man grab my hand, intertwining our fingers, while being followed in the store...Black love.

The kind of love that knows struggle to the point it makes us emotionally bound even though we are strangers...Black love.

A love that makes our hips ride bass lines because we have jungle in our blood...Black love.

Through our kinks, relaxers, press and curls, we gather together gossiping about this Black love and that Black love; getting gorgeous for the Black love at home.

Waiting for bald fades, line-ups, ceasers, and goatee trims, Black love floats through the air in the form of jokes, jives, and high fives.

As we waltz through February, I look forward to being more aware of the complexity of Black love. How about you?

Stay peace

Monday Night FreeStyle

2009-02-02T18:39:00.000-08:00

To Be Continued

It isn't the way I move my hips
slightly out of tune
as if my momma wasn't black
that makes my rhythm unique

It isn't the way my hair kinks and curls
with no destination
as if my roots have a mind of their own
that makes my style 'ethnic'

It isn't the way I love my man
through hills and valleys
as if our chemistry is magnetic
that makes me a greater woman

And

It isn't the way I hold my children
through night terrors and soiled diapers and teen angst
as if they are appendages of my soul
that makes me mother of the year

It's the way that I smile
It's the heartiness of my laughter
It's the birthmark in the white of my eye
the smirk defining my sarcastic nature
the way I love my double D's
the power of my voice
the reason in the depth of my decisions
the empathy I carry on my sleeve
the tears I refuse to shed
the violence I do not partake in
the adoration of my melanin
the thirst for knowledge I have
the hunger for equality burning righteously within me
the way I purse my lips before I bless someone
the tumbles and turns of life that I refuse to let hold me back

that defines me
all that I am

and in this moment
I realize I am all that
and more

So no, it isn't my penchant for vintage clothing that makes me a throwback girl
And it isn't my disdain for designer labels that makes me frugal
It's my reality of me
And it could be that I'm just cheap
haven't dug that deep
I am to be continued

Stay peace

genesis

I'll NEVER Accept It

2008-12-03T18:32:00.000-08:00

I've seen a lot of things. But there are somethings that I refuse to accept, no matter how often I see them...

A few weeks ago I went to court with a co-worker and my stomach literally knotted when I saw a boy, no older than 16, in a prison jumpsuit and shackles. And I can't deny that I probably would have cried... in the car... had I driven myself. It's one thing to see it on television and something totally different when it's all up in your face. He was a baby... is a baby.

And I can't tell you that I wasn't seeing through a mother's eyes. I'm a mother no matter what my occupation is and it isn't a role you can just switch off and on. When I saw this child, something struck a nerve. I even put the entire situation in perspective... he wasn't there because he was 'child of the year'... broke the law in some way. Maybe he killed someone, maybe he cursed out the wrong cop, maybe he's a victim of racial profiling, maybe he was in the wrong place at the wrong time, maybe he beat up his mom... or sold drugs, was a pimp, was a runner, or just the cool guy who didn't flee....

I made up all these 'stories' about him, 'cause I didn't know him. But still... seeing a young person, in prison-issued garments... shackled wrists to hips, ankle to ankle... will never be something I can accept. Ever. 'Cause it isn't supposed to be that way...

Where are we failing? And what's working? When we begin to look at the things that are keeping kids out of juvenile detention centers, we'll be in a better position for really executing change.

Stay peace

5+2=7 But that doesn't make any sense....

2008-11-09T13:53:00.000-08:00

My son came to me wide-eyed and jittery. As he held up two wiggly fingers on one hand and five on the other, he said, "Mommy, two plus five equals seven. And four plus three equals seven. But that doesn't make any sense." I couldn't tell if he was excited or confused, but I'm guessing it was a bit of both. "Baby, there are many ways to add things up to equal seven. And there are many ways you can subtract things from each other that equal seven. There is more than one way to get all numbers."

Even though he said, "Ok," I know this was not enough for him. But he scampered away holding up seven fingers and shaking his head. His innocent, six year-old thoughts gave me pause. How old was I when I realized there was more to reality than my perspective? When will he realize this?

He's at a stage in life where, though he recognizes black and white, grey doesn't exist. Either you're good or bad...right or wrong.

His perception made me think about a question my husband asked me before Obama became our President-elect; How can we tell our son Obama didn't win?

With such immature rationale, how would I have been able to tell him that without answering why questions in a way he'd understand? How would I have been able to show him that collectively, we can do ALL things under Christ? What would my proof have been? I can't put up fingers and 'show' him why Obama lost.

Not only will I not have to answer these questions (though I'm sure there are many tough questions to be answered), I will not have to prematurely cloud my six year old's mind with other perceptions he won't understand...yet.

But what he did understand was Obama was the only way to go. One day, he'll understand that since we've had our 'Obama' moment, there has to be many more ways that will equal (and surpass) the perception of our people and our nation. But it's up to us, it's up to our sons and daughters, and their sons and daughters... we make up this nation and it's only fair that we are represented.

So be mindful of where your children are mentally. Listen to what they know so you can build upon it; make it better. But don't wait. Today is the day. The older they get, the easier it will be for television, radio, internet, and their just-as-naive friends to infiltrate their thoughts and distort reality and for whose greater good?

Happy Sunday!

Obama - Luther King by *BenHeine on deviant ART

That's what you get for thinking...

2008-10-22T17:37:00.000-07:00

Learning that people aren't what they appear to be, situations are much deeper than what's on the surface, and visions are flawed is a phenomena that most of us encounter daily. And when faced with the opposite of what we thought was going on most times seem surprising, it really only informs us of our biases, preconceived notions, and the stereotypical nature that festers in all of us.

After I all but confessed my ignorance of some things, I can remember my father saying many times, "That's what you get for thinking." Though he never told me exactly what that meant. I get it now. Thanks daddy!

The Write Way #3 I Hear Voices

2008-10-18T20:33:00.000-07:00

Yes, I hear voices and they aren't from dead people. But I'm not the only person who hears them. Every author in blank-pagedom hears them. They wake us from the most comfortable slumber. They speak to us when other people are speaking to us. Yes, they are rude little voices. And irritating, at times.

Our characters have a way of birthing themselves. And these aren't normal births where the newborn starts out at 8 lbs., 2 ounces and 19 inches long or even start as embryos in our wombs. Most time, we're birthing adults, the elderly, and even some speaking from the grave. Damn, I know I said the voices weren't from dead people. Guess I lied. They're coming into existences as bratty-ass teens, snot nosed toddlers...hell, they're even drug addicts and prostitutes.

The only thing we can do to stop these voices from overtaking us is to write them, the way they want to be written. But here's the trick....you have to also incorporate your own voice in what you write. Since these voices aren't about you, have nothing to do with you, and only want to use you, you better learn how to speak up for yourself and say, "This is how I will write about you." You have to come to terms that you'll have some dick-head in your story that you may not like. Or some whiny-ass woman who grates at your jugular. But you also have to find a happy medium between their voices and yours. A lot of writers make this mistake. Let's see if I can explain it.

When your characters speak (read: dialogue). It's their time to shine. But every other place in the work-in-progress is all about the writer's voice. Sure, you'll have to paint pictures of what your character is doing and how they're feeling, but this is where your voice comes in. This is where you make your mark. The voices you constantly hear know nothing about using too many adjectives and adverbs. They don't know when modifiers dangle... It's how you handle the in-between what they do know...

I'm still finding my voice so the only thing I can say to help you along is continuing writing how you write to find your own. What I know is you can't let your characters write your whole book for you. Don't depend on them for everything.

So what do you have to say about character's voices vs. writer's voices ?

Stay tuned for The Write Way #4 Tell me what you want, Gina, dayum!

Avoid the lines. VOTE early!!

Thursday Thirteen #6-The Name Game

2008-10-08T19:48:00.000-07:00

The Name Game ( I borrowed it from Bizarre JC)

1.Your rock star name (first pet, current car): Dog Contour

2.Your gangsta name (favorite ice cream flavor, favorite type of shoe): Mint Chocolate Chip Sneakers (uggg...that's just trife and soooo not gangsta!)

3.Your Native American name (favorite color, favorite animal): Brown cat

4.Your soap opera name (middle name, city where you were born): Jacque' (and no, it isn't pronounced Jackie or Jackay) Cleveland

5.Your Star Wars name (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 of your first name): Fradar

6.Superhero name (2nd favorite color, favorite drink): Blue coffee (I guess you wouldn't want me to help you with that type of name)

7.NASCAR name (the first names of your grandfathers): Leon George

8.Dancer name (the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy): Chloe Narcisse Sweet Tart

9.TV weather anchor name (your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter): Deadwyler Detroit

10.Spy name (your favorite season/holiday, flower): Fall Sunflower

11.Cartoon name:(favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now): Banana Nightgown

12.Hippie name (what you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree): Apple dumpling Bonsai

13.Movie star name (first pet's name, first street where you lived): Snowball Quimby

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday.  Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged!  If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments.  It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

The Write Way #2 Editors

2008-09-25T20:25:00.000-07:00

What does copyediting, proofreading, developmental editing, and substantive editing have in common?

Only that the individuals doing these things to your manuscript are going to point out something you need to work on.

AND you're going to piss them off, as the author, because of your poor use of the English language, your wayward inconsistencies, and your total disregard for grammar rules (they seem to have some sort of fixation on the latter). That's about it.

A simple internet search on any of these terms will yield a million results (all of which would be better than my explanation so I'll leave the definitions to the internet experts). But I want to discuss 'decisions' here. Now, I'm not published so there are some (read: alot of) things I don't know and hopefully some of you reading this can help me out (again...as I learn the craft...).

When your manuscript is returned with edits, don't always take the edits as written in stone. If your editor thinks a concept...a word...a scene should be a certain way and it isn't in your vision, ask them about it. Is this not your heart on paper? Would you allow someone else to tell you how to feel? I don't think so...or at least I hope not. And if your editor gets snippy, snotty, or doesn't and isn't willing to give you an explanation for their suggestions, I SUGGEST you find another one (I recommend Shonell Bacon, by the way). Why? Because you need someone who supports your vision. And if your editor is changing your vision, without just cause then they're borderline ghostwriting, IMO. I may be wrong and I don't know how much control over edits you eventually have, but I live in lala-writer-land and my hope is whomever edits my work, believes in my work enough to edit along my vision, if my vision makes sense.

Now, I'm not talking about if you're doing something dead wrong in your manuscript. If it makes sense to you and your book, then by all means do what they ask...with a smile. But there's nothing wrong with asking questions, right?

Am I too far off thinking this?

Tune in to The Write Way #3 I Hear Voices (and they are not from dead people)

The Write Way #1 Learn the Craft

2008-09-25T19:13:00.000-07:00

What I hear most from published authors is (drumroll please)

LEARN THE CRAFT

I used to think what the hell whenever I heard it. I got so tired of hearing it, I started saying it to others. But what I didn't know was that learning the craft had everything to do with writing, and simultaneously, had nothing to do with writing.

While I'm 'learning the craft' and attempting to weave it into my writing, I'm finding out what I've learned and what my imagination conjures up, can't coexist...initially. Ahh, there was my problem. I'm typing (or writing) trying to pay attention to structure, flow, tense, pov, grammar, etc., etc., when, in essence, none of that shit matters. (Sorry mommy but I'm upset with myself right now) The only thing that matters when I'm putting pen to pad or fingertips to keys is my IMAGINATION. To hell with all the mechanics. Forget the comma I'm not to sure is placed correctly and, at this point, I'm loving my dangling modifiers.

Learn the craft of writing is a misleading statement. It led me to believe that the craft had all to do with writing right. But that isn't it. And I finally get it. Or at least I get a portion of it. The next time someone tells me this, I'm going to ask them what they mean. As of today, this is my process:

Write the damn story for me (imagination)
Rewrite the damn story for them (layer in the mechanics)
Send the hot mess to an editor (who can magically merge my imagination and the mechanics)
Decide if the merger coincides with my vision and make corrections

Hmm....looks like NaNoWriMo is on to something...

Tune in for The Write Way #2 Editors

Free Books

2008-09-24T06:27:00.000-07:00

Yeah, here you come a-running...lol I would to. As a matter of fact, I already have. Yasmin, APOOO founder, hipped her blog readers on to contests on the net where you can enter to win books. Below are the ones I've entered and you better hurry, they end soon. Click the title for instant access.

Book of Lies by Brad Meltzer

Testimony by Anita Shreve

Matrimony by Josh Henkins

Happy blog hopping

Change is good

2008-09-23T20:05:00.000-07:00

I can't profess to be the champion of change, but I also can't say that I'm not. How two-faced of me, right? I'm experiencing a lot of change in my life; personal and professional. And I'm welcoming it all. With so many things on my to-do list in life, I'm at the stage where I personify the Nike slogan; Just do it (insert check here)!

All the changes I'm making are difficult. But not so difficult that I can't overcome them. For instance, I'm taking tap classes. Picture that. A 32 year old woman, slightly overweight (according to medical standards, but I really have curves for days), trying to perform riffs and scuffles... But I'm doing it. As a matter of fact, I'm so determined to impress myself, that I've just finished two hours of practice a minute ago, yet my official tap lessons are on Mondays. Persistence pays. And the few pounds I need to lose, will be lost doing something I'm growing to love. Lawd knows I'm allergic to exercise. (Hush, tap CAN'T be exercise...it just can't...lol)

On a professional level, I'm moving to a different position within my agency...working with teens. No, I'm not trying to kill myself. Just trying to grow a little. It's the only population I have yet to work with. But I'm all for it.

My mommy always told me to work hard for the things I want. And I want so many things for me, for my family, for my life... So I'm working it and there's never a better time than the present.

Stay peace

Thursday Thirteen #5...what was that u said?

2008-09-17T20:33:00.000-07:00

This Thursday I chose to list 13 words people say that make me want to fight them

1. mouf for mouth
2. munf for month
3. teef for teeth
4. burf for birth
5. Egglanta for Atlanta (sorry mommy, but you know this URKS me!!)
6. liberry for library
7. Walmark for Walmart
8. fewt for fruit
9. ainchus for anxious
10. aks for ask
11. excape for escape
12. conversate instead of converse
13. perscription for prescription

And just for kicks I'm going to add two more: prolly/probly for probably and excetera for et cetera

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Thursday Thirteen #4...R.I.P

2008-09-11T13:53:00.000-07:00

Since today is a day for paying respects to those who lost their lives seven years ago, I decided to pay respect to 13 celebrities that I've loved and lost. Rest in peace...

1. Bernie Mac

2. Aaliyah

3. Issac Hayes

4. Estelle Getty

5. Sean Levert

6. Heath Ledger

7. Pimp C (of UGK)

8. Tupac

9. Biggie

10. John Ritter

11. Anna Nicole Smith

12. Tim Russert

13. Eazy E

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Thursday Thirteen #3-- Oh so cute!

2008-09-04T00:00:00.000-07:00

I decided to share with you the 13 male celebrities that only seem to look finer with time...IMO. I love 'em young and old...lol

1. George Clooney...how many ways can you say hott?

2. Morgan Freeman...you should have called me. Wouldn't have been any accidents...QQ

3. Eric Braeden..I don't even watch stories, but I've been a Victor Newman fan since I was a little girl. Can you say FYNE???

4. Kiefer Sutherland..I am attracted to the quirky types and he's just that type...lol

5. Denzel Washington...can get it!

6. Magic Johnson...can't get it but he's cute!

7. Harvey Keitel...age does him well.

8. Simon Cowell...I don't care what y'all say, he's on fyre! I'd snuggle with this ole mean behind any day!

9. Brad Pitt...speechless

10. Terrance Howard..stop drooling...it isn't over

11. Jamie Foxx..>DAYUMMMM...or Mm Mm good :)

12. Maxwell...can definitely get it! And get it again, and again, and did I say again???

13. Mark Wahlberg...he's so freaking adorable. Even when we knew him as Marky Mark...lol

People with something to say....

2008-08-31T06:41:00.000-07:00

With a drop date of November 4, 2008, there is quite a buzz about Sister Souljah's sequel to The Coldest Winter Ever, Midnight: A Gangster Love Story.

And I'm one of the millions of people who'll pick this up hot off the presses. Not only because its predecessor is deemed a classic among street literature, but more because Sister Souljah has a message for ALL people and she isn't afraid to share it. She's a no-holds-barred type of sistah and someone who doesn't talk just to be talking or write just to be writing. I value her opinion and she gives good food for thought. Don't believe me? Check out these 90's video I found perusing one the the many Nings I'm a part of.

Is her POV still relevant in 2008?

The one below has a few parts, but I wanted to take you to church today. So here is Pt 1.

Pt. 2

Pt. 3

Pt. 4

Pt. 5

Wednesdays & Fridays Blog coming soon!

2008-08-27T19:42:00.000-07:00

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Check us out on September 3, 2008 at

http://wednesdaysandfridays.blogspot.com

For interviews:

published authors email whoareyouwednesdays@yahoo.com

unpublished authors email readytopublishfriday@yahoo.com

STAY TUNED!

Hot Fun in the Summertime

2008-08-23T07:01:00.000-07:00

Head on over to APOOO's Hot Fun in the Summertime for the down low of why I love urban fiction.

Click HERE

Stay peace

I've been TAGGED!!!

2008-08-15T03:43:00.000-07:00

Here’s the idea (you can copy this paragraph to use in your post):

I am going to list three categories of books. 5 MUST Read Books, 5 Books on Your Nightstand, and 5 Look For These Soon. Keeping with the theme, I am going to tag at least 5 bloggers. They should put these same lists on their blog but SUBTRACT one book from each list and ADD one of their own. Then they should tag at least 5 more bloggers. It will be fun to see how the lists change as it goes around the blogosphere. Please come back to this post and leave a comment so I can see how the lists are changing as they go around the blogosphere. Since this is Book Buzz…please keep your lists to titles released in 2007-2009.

5 MUST Read Books:
Them by Nathan McCall
Orange Mint and Honey by Carliss Brice
Yellow Moon by Jewell Parker Rhodes
Conception by Kalisha Buckhanon

The Coldest Winter Ever by Sister Soulja

5 Books on the Nightstand:
Song Yet Sung by James McBride
Pig Candy: Taking My Father South, Taking my Father Home Lise Funderburg
From Harvey River by Lorna Goodison
Trading Dreams at Midnight by Dianne McKinney Whetstone

Still Dirty by Vickie Stringer

5 Look For These Soon:
House at Sugar Beach by Helen Cooper
The Hemingses of Monticello: An American Family
Midnight: A Gangster Love Story by Sister Souljah
The Hood Life: A Bentley Manor Tale by Meesha Mink and De'nesha Diamond
Red Light Special by Risque

The bloggers I’m asking to post the lists (and make one book-for-book change to each list if they wish):

Terra Little
The Moody Gemini
Gwenyth Bolton

Don't know who else I can tag!!!

Thursday Thirteen #2-- Where I visit...daily

2008-08-13T19:01:00.000-07:00

I'm ALWAYS on the internet...always. Besides blogs, these are sites I visit nearly every day ( I didn't link them...sorry)

1. www.craigslist.com
2. www.mediatakeout.com
3. www.twitter.com (recently)
4. www.woot.com
5. www.cleveland.com
6. www.amazon.com
7. www.wikipedia.com
8. www.cpl.org
9. www.apooobooks.com
10. www.essence.com
11. www.soyouwanna.com (my favorite place to visit...I'm such a nerd!)
12. www.dummies.com
13. www.youtube.com

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Call for Authors

2008-08-10T20:51:00.001-07:00

New WeBlog Alert!!

The upcoming Wednesdays & Fridays Blog’s main objective is to spotlight YOU

Authors, published and unpublished, who are ready to get their shine on

Who Are You Wednesdays will peek inside the minds of authors who have crossed the publishing threshold, offering information about their books, and give something back to the writing universe by providing valuable insight into this exciting realm.

Ready to Publish Fridays will feature authors who have complete, submission-ready manuscripts and would like to showcase their talent with the pen. These interviews will spotlight the challenging roads traveled and explore unearthed knowledge digested while trying to navigate the seas of the unpublished writer.

No worries. Our intent is not to have your story ideas stolen. Unpublished author's interviews will tap into the mind of the writer and give readers a chance to get to know you before you start gracing literary charts!

We consider all writing genres, including poetry and graphic novels. Wednesdays & Fridays Blog is home for all writers and one of the few places where writing is writing…period. It is a place where published and unpublished authors converse.

Wednesdays & Fridays Blog wants to interview any author who meets the following criteria:

Must be traditionally or self published
or
Must have a complete, submission-ready manuscript and never been published

All email inquiries will receive a response within three (3) days of request. Our response will include a deadline for interview answers to be received usually not exceeding seven (7) days, including weekends.

If you would like to be featured on the Wednesdays & Fridays Blog, email the correct address below for consideration.

Published authors email JC Martin at whoareyouwednesdays@yahoo.com
Unpublished authors email DJ Frazier (genesis) at readytopublishfriday@yahoo.com

Thursday Thirteen

2008-08-07T10:23:00.000-07:00

When I was a teen, I can't remember a moment without music just 'being there'... I'd wake up, turn on the radio, pop a tape in the tape deck (yeah you know the ones we put the tissue in the corners so we could record over what's already on there), and start my morning. Then I'd come home, do homework (to music), do chores (to music), hang out outside (to music), and gawk over the muscle clad boys who walked around with their boomboxes on their shoulders... those were the good old days. Even now, as I write this blog there is music spending in the backgroud :) In no particular order are some of my faves.

Thirteen Things about my favorite songs of long ago

1. It's Over by The Gyrlz

2. I'm Bad by LL Cool J

3. Children's Story by Slick Rick

4. Ribbon in the Sky by Stevie Wonder

5. Missing You by Diana Ross (I think of my dad when I listen to this.)

6. La Di Da Di by Slick Rick and Doug E. Fresh

7. Mary Jane by Rick James

8. Out On a Limb by Teena Marie

9. Real M********** G's by Easy E (uncensored, view with caution)

10. Where Do Broken Hearts Go by Whitney Houston

11. I Will Always Love You by Troop

12. D0 Me by Bell Bive DeVoe (BBD)

13. Remember The Time by Michael Jackson (no Michael jokes please, I'm a real FAN and will cut you over him!!)

Saturday morning freestyle

2008-08-02T06:58:00.001-07:00

I have a summer bug, complete with an extremely sore throat and sinus headache. I figured I'd do something I love and maybe it'll ease the pounding in my head. It probably won't, but it'll leave me with some degree of satisfaction. I'm going to write a poem, making it up at I tap on the keys. Whatever comes up, will come out so feel me...

If it were meant to be
we'd rule the world...
women would rule the world
stamp out violence while at early morning hair appointments
eliminate greed with Asian men pampering our feet
we'd rule the world
with red garter belts full of promises from late night romps
when Mother Nature consumes and syncs us
reminding us that we are much more... PERIOD
soft skinned, full breasted, love handles and all
callin' the shots and ballin' til we fall
ladies... we know how to do it
'cause the fluid that controls our hearts
constantly overflows
we'll allow no man to be without a bowl or a home
we'd swim in affection perfectly lining the curbs
crossing our T's and living our verbs
see what I mean?
war would evolve to be
like having no ham hocks for the black eyed peas
guns would spit messages like Cupid's arrows and controlled by children
killing the ills of whatever soul broke the woman-law
we'd pump fists in solidarity and our land would be clean
equality would exist and would clearly be seen
our kids would be kids
our men would be men
our sanity would be saved and we'd die with smiles on our faces
then placed in vaults surrounded by love
and hope
and satisfaction
...if it were meant to be
women would rule the world...

Stay peace

Another 'FIRST'

2008-07-27T10:00:00.000-07:00

I was nine years-old, my sister was eight, and my little brother was three when we were grating on my father's nerves by jumping around in our bedroom. We also had a friend from across the street over; she was about twelve at the time. He and my mom had company. They were playing cards downstairs and all of the children were sent upstairs to play in the room above them.

I can't even tell you how many times we were warned to stop stomping. But it seemed the more times my dad told us to stop, the more empowered we felt when we stomped harder. My dad is like Homie the Clown. And as you all know, Homie don't play that. This was my first brush with a creative ass whooping...if I can even call it that.

The last time he marched up the steps, he had his black, leather belt in his hand; one end wound around his closed fist, while the other end dangled. Time freaking froze. My dad was a pro when it came to his belt game. I did not want another whooping. I was always first, since I was the oldest, and I felt like I always got it worse. With a voice deeper then James Earl Jones, my dad told us sit on the floor with our backs against the wall. He told us to remove our shoes and socks, and hold our legs straight out with our toes pointed toward the ceiling. Then he commenced to whipping our feet.

Do you know how hard it is to move in this position? We were stuck like chuck and up shit's creek without a boat or paddle.

I also remember a time when I had to wash dishes and everyone that knows me, knows I HATE to wash dishes. Well, my dad came in to get water and happened to get a glass that I half-ass washed. Oh LAWD! He was going to beat me. At least that's what I thought. But he didn't. He took every dish, out of every cabinet in the kitchen, piled them on top of the kitchen counter and table, and made me wash them all. He then told me, "if I find one dirty dish when you are done, I'm gone beat yo' ass." You would have thought I was doing a scientific experiment by the way I was examining each dish after I washed it. But it did the trick.

I think things like these are missing from child rearing today; Good ole fashion beatings, instilling fear in our children, and last but not least, DADS!!!

What type of creative punishments/whoopings have you ever had? And what else do you think is missing with the current generations when it comes to raising children?

Blog Hop

2008-07-26T05:35:00.000-07:00

Hey Friends! Hope everyone is having a productive or relaxing Saturday.

Author Terra Little is blogging "The Passing Series" on The Official Blog-Zine of Author Terra Little

If you are interested or curious about self-publishing, you may want to head on over by clicking the link above.

Stay peace

Genesis

I couldn't help myself, but regardless...

2008-07-23T18:57:00.000-07:00

WTH????

I know I'm ignorant at times. And my friend Aaq is just as ignorant for sending me this. She KNOWS how silly and goofy I can be.

Now for real, I know this is a woman and all...but how many of you would sacrifice your femininity for a body like this?

And did you catch the nipple action? LOL

ABC's

2008-07-18T16:09:00.000-07:00

I learned a lot of rules from my mommy. And a few of, what I consider, the most important rules I've learned are:

(A) Mind Your Own Business

(B)God don't like ugly and He ain't too fond of pretty

(C)Think before you speak

So let's talk about A (in my world)... If you are minding your own business (busyness) then you have no time to mind mine. Point blank. Period. And when you try to mind my business, then my busyness begins to include putting you in your place, by any means necessary. And when I'm done, I'm sure you'll know that 'it wasn't none of your business in the first place'.

On to B, the 'ugliness'... Conniving, ignorant liars make me itch in unmentionable (and often unreachable) places. It itches so bad, I grin when these type of people are mentioned or are in my vicinity. I grin so wide, you'd swear the legendary Redd Foxx whispered a joke in my ear or something. Why grin? Because God don't like ugly and I know that...it's not for me to tell them about themselves. They KNOW how they are...trust me...they do. They may not know that I know and that's what makes me grin. I know how to handle people like that...when I understand how they are. And remember G.I. Joe's motto: Knowing is half the battle...

According to Socrates (via Plato), "False words are not only evil in themselves, but they infect the soul with evil."

And a Persian proverb that got my favorite soulsistah an F on her college paper sums up how I feel, and think, about these type of people so well...

He who knows not, and knows not that he knows not, is a fool, shun him;
He who knows not, and knows that he knows not, is a child, teach him;
He who knows, and knows not that he knows, is asleep, wake him;
He who knows, and knows that he knows, is wise, follow him.

Now C...It's imperative to human existence for people to think before speaking. If you don't, more than likely whatever you've said (a) doesn't make sense, (b) makes you look like an idiot, and/or (c)is all the way wrong. There isn't too much more I can say about C...it speaks for itself because it is, what it is...

By now, you've probably figured out that someone(s) has rubbed me the wrong way (and for the last time, might I add). If you received an email from me about this blog, then it probably wasn't you. BUT if by chance someone forwarded this blog entry to you, then (a) it definitely is YOU(insert grin here), (b) someone wants you to learn some basic rules of life, or (c) someone knows that you know a person who needs this message.

Stay peace

Oh so relaxing...

2008-07-07T18:00:00.000-07:00

What a lot of people don't know about me is that I have great admiration for natural things. Not particularly natural foods or the like, but the basics of nature. The way the wind sounds when rustling a tree's leaves, bird chirps, the way lightening bugs illuminate space at night, and...just about anything that occurs naturally...without effort. Those things that just are, because they are...

I recently spent a few days in Hocking Hills (Logan, Ohio) and had my way with nature. My husband and I visited Cedar Falls, which compared to what I've seen before amounted more to Cedar Trickle, but it was still beautiful. Here are a few pics I took:

My chocolate Ty

The way the sun highlighted the rocks was gorgeous!

Me (of course)

Cedar Falls

Gotta appreciate a good water pic!

Afterwards, we made our way up the road to Ash Cave. Though the cave wasn't what I expected, I still appreciated it in all it's man-made glory.

The wooden stairs to the cave seemed to never end

Yes, that's more water

Looking up from inside the cave almost made me dizzy

My baby taking in all the glory

Neatly tucked away in this picture is a deer we encountered. My husband called me a punk because I was about to take off when I saw it. I love nature, but I'm smart enough to realize when I'm not a part of the home team, kwim?

And this was our little home away from home. It's called A Stones Throw

That hot tube got a nice work out!

Sitting area where we drank and talked until we slurred (and played Playstation 2 games for as long as we wanted!)

One of the three bedrooms we had (would have posted a pic of our room, but we couldn't make the bed right...lol)

Full kitchen where we prepared each other lovely dinners

Partial view of the front yard

The well house (yes, they use well water...we were in the country...lol). If you look close enough, the sign above the door says HOE HOUSE. Pretty funny since historically outhouses were once used by prostitutes and their johns to do their business.

So this ends the part of the trip I'm willing the share. The rest will be between Tyrone, me, and that bomb azz hot tube ;)~

BTW...this was our eighth anniversary trip...big feat for a young couple. We don't have very many married friends, or friends whose marriages lasted longer than a hiccup. This trip went back in time for us. Our very first date was...yup, you guessed it, in the woods. I loves me some him...it's natural.

Stay peace

Genesis

Enjoy until I return...

2008-07-02T04:34:00.000-07:00

see more pwn and owned pictures

see more pwn and owned pictures

see more pwn and owned pictures

see more pwn and owned pictures

Want access to me on your desktop?

2008-06-29T12:22:00.001-07:00

Download my widget for instant, desktop access to my blog. Click the little green icon with the white circle on it (on the widget below) and follow the instructions. Thanks!

Get this widget!

Come on people....

2008-06-27T20:15:00.001-07:00

I'm surfing the net when I should be completing my outline for my next novel, but what is a writer without distraction? Unheard of, that's what it is. So I stumbled upon a little celebrity news that had me scratching my head, laughing, and down right puzzled me. What do you think about these?

Verne Troyer, the infamous Mini Me of the Austin Powers series, apparently had a sex tape stolen from him. He is suing TMZ.com (for $20 MIL *cough*) for publishing it on their website. Now Ion know about you, but WHY would I want to see such a tape. Well, I'm guessing little people sex would pique the curiosity of some, but I have to be honest and say that all it could do is make me snicker and I know that ain't right.

HERE is the complete article

Next up...

Miley Cyrus, Hannah Montana star, took this picture for Vanity Fair. The 15 year old is hurt that everyone is so critical of this 'mistake'. Stating to Billboard...

"I don't think people will look at me any differently, because they're like, 'You know what, I'm going to do stupid stuff too, and I'm going to make mistakes, and that's fine,'"

"It still hurts when I think about it – but you know what, it doesn't mean that you can't move on."

Ion know Hannah, I mean Miley...you are only 15. I'm all for keeping clothing ON kids.

HERE is the article

Next...

Now what could Erykah Badu possibly have done? It's alleged that she announced on her myspace page that she is going to start selling rolling papers...yeah the kind you put the sticky icky in (marijuana for all those hoodlinguistic challenged folk...so what that isn't a word!) What she do is damn sure her beeswax, but I don't think endorsing the use of drugs is the way to go. But Snoop (and many others) have done it for years....

HERE
is the article (but this is a gossip site FOR REAL)

NEXT...

Yes...yes...um no, Shaq. This freestyle, caught on tape, cost Shaq a few lawman badges. Now...I watched it and even beyond the fact that Shaq's freestyle game is wiggity, wiggity wack (this from a Shaq fan for life), he dropped the N bomb in public and topped it off with this line

Now that's the difference between first and last place... Kobe (expletive) tell me how my ass taste

in which he repeated the ass line 7 times...yes, I counted.

Wanna see for yourself? Click HERE

So now it's time for me to say goodbye...I must get back to my outline.

Stay peace

Genesis

Mommy News

2008-06-08T11:39:00.000-07:00

The last two weeks have been full of emotional things for me. Here are a few of my highest-highs.

My daughter, left, and my sister, right, are officially high school students. Their eighth grade promotion was last week and they are very excited about going to the big leagues...lol

I had on 4in wedges because I wasn't gonna let these lil kids just tower over me like that! My sister is actually taller than I am.

These are my men-children and we were attending my eldest son's kindergarten promotion. I don't think my youngest liked that he wasn't the center of attention. My baby received all of the honors; perfect attendance, citizenship, most outstanding student, and honor roll. Those are the four pinned to him (the green one is hiding, trust me there are four...lol). His paper awards were numerous as well, but I won't get into that.

Did I mention he was killing 'em in his oatmeal linen suit? Give my baby a crowd to speak in front of any day...lol

My husband was given the Very Important Parent award. Did I feel cheated after all the fundraisers and events I've been a part of? Nope. I was proud to have my man standing there among all of the mothers. Real fathers deserve to get their shine on too!

The lady that I circled in the pic was my daughter's kindergarten teacher years ago

What recent mommy or daddy news would you like to share?

Firsts

2008-06-07T17:20:00.000-07:00

I remember walking down the alleyway while listening to my AM/FM, cassette deck thingamajiggy. My head bopping to whatever was on the radio at the time. Probably LL Cool J or Janet Jackson...something popular in 1987. The sun was beaming on my fresh press and curl and sweat rolled down my back. I waved at the little, caramel old lady sitting on the porch watching her special needs grandson play. They always seemed to be out when I walked to the store. Deciding I'd take the back entrance into the store's parking lot, I heard the deejay on 93.1 (WZAK) solemnly announce that Scott La Rock had been shot and killed.

KRS-ONE, D Nice, & Scott La Rock (BDP)

My eleven year-old mind couldn't wrap itself around the concept of Scott La Rock no longer being a part of B(oogie) D(own) P(roductions), much less no longer living. Even though I had experienced the death of my father only six years prior, I still didn't understand this death thing. Scott was shot. And so was my father.

At this time, I thought everyone died by being shot.

Share with me the first musician's death you remember and how it impacted your thoughts on the world at the time.

Here's a list to prompt your memory...

Reviews get...reviewed

2008-05-16T18:30:00.000-07:00

Reviewing is hard work. Writing is hard work.

What some may not realize is that just as an author makes themselves vulnerable to criticism, a reviewer does as well. Those who really take reviewing seriously are just as much a target when we post our opinions.

I mean...

Don't reviews get...reviewed?

On Amazon, books are rated 1 to 5...aren't reviews rated helpful yes or no? If you post a review on Myspace, does its interface not allow you to give 1 or 2 kudos? Just as reviewers have favorite authors who sometimes disappoint them, don't you think there's a possibility that authors will have reviewers who will sometimes disappoint them, too?

I wholeheartedly believe that an author is entitled to the anger they feel when they receive a less than desirable review, as well as the reviewer who may be upset because they had to struggle through bad editing or weak plots. It's when the reader/reviewer react to it in an extreme manner that is the problem...

We need to respect each others' gangsta. Period.

Don't forget to check out the tribute to my mommy. She's the bomb. Click HERE

Darnetta a.k.a. Poetic Genesis
Author/Reviewer
(future)Graphic Designer
*header by Darnetta
*additional example HERE

As is the mother...

2008-05-14T05:00:00.000-07:00

APOOO is hosting Every Day is Mother's Day for the month of May, and it is with much gratitude that I am allowed to present to you the most wonderful woman in my life; my mommy. I'm blessed to have a mother who makes me feel rich, empowered, and loved. She also makes some mean rice pudding (HINT! HINT!).

Thank you APOOO for honoring mothers.

Thank you mommy for being you and encouraging me to be me. I love you!

Thank you, my friends, for stopping by and please leave a comment. Tell me what the 'bestest' dish your mom (or other mother) makes or just let me know you stopped by.

Created by D.J. Frazier

Listen to the babies

2008-04-30T18:57:00.000-07:00

Press play, then read what the babies are saying...

VERSE 1

Ain’t no daddies where I’m from it’s just mad mothers
And eyes that still seem they can’t look past color
Why am I disrespected by someone I should call brother
And why girls feel unpretty and constantly hate each other
Bad air in my lungs, man I can’t breathe
My eyes burnin’ from all the dirt and the debris
And it’s third degree, I’m motionless on the scene
It’s like a disease the way ya’ll killin’ me

HOOK
I’m sixteen and I shouldn’t have to feel like this
I’m sixteen every young boy out here want to kiss
I’m sixteen and me and my mama going through it
I’m sixteen on the block, sixteen on the block
I’m sixteen at war (6)
I’m sixteen on the block, sixteen on the block

VERSE 2
Around here cool is another word for fool
If he smoke, then she smoke, I gotta smoke too
Now what would I do if I didn’t have a clue
I’m sixteen y.o., asking God oh why oh
If my clothes ain’t tight, then he ain’t gon’ like me
Eyes on the prize so the next girl dress just like me
I’m so full of promise but why promise
If I’ma just be rewarded by bad actions
To him I’m just a transaction

HOOK

BRIDGE
I want you to love my mind, my smile, my style
I want you to know the best of me
I want to belong without being treated like property
Why does it seem like fantasy?

They speak loudly and clearly... there wouldn't be Mother's Day without them.

AND

If you haven't voted for me in the Virtual Spoken Word Showcase, you still have time. APOOO <<---Click there and follow the link to vote! Thanks in advance for your support.

Stay peace

16 at War by Karina Pasian
Lyrics courtesy of lyricsreg.com
song courtesy of youtube.com

Virtual Spoken Word Showcase

2008-04-27T18:49:00.001-07:00

I participated in a Virtual Spoken Word Showcase sponsored by APOOO Books and Urban Echoes Entertainment and now it's time to vote---->APOOO<-----click there

I am in the last 3 minutes of the show, but feel free to listen to entire show. There was a lot of talent on the internet waves that night.

It Calls Me

It calls me--
Y'all don't understand, I said
it calls me,
from the back of that part of the brain that determines my sanity,
handing me illusion after illusion of
misproported distortion it calls
with legs parted like shallow waves,
days of unwashed crevices left by an unsanitary hooker.
Should I listen?
Its message unclear, its intent misunderstood--
Could this vision lack reason?
See, the mechanics of the situation make me panic like a fiend
Scheming to get that next high, I
prowl like mary jane
penetrating manure, an illegal nigga garden.
It's starting to whisper in my ear more often.
It's starting to make my decisions for me, poorly perpetrating my character,
dominating, scared of the possibility that I might contradict its demands,
And- I- Am
TOTALLY influenced by its nuisance.
WE ARE ONE
It led me to that alley where I blessed my pipe with holy sewer water, washed in my peers’ blood,
but sanctified,
no one cried when my spirit betrayed me,
when I existed as whole, yet stole on demand,
took food out my own kids’ hands, slept with man after man and pranced around like not a damn thing was wrong.
Its instruction turned to psalm,
Biblical hymnals, pew splinters in my ass,
fire at my heels ‘cause I'm going straight to hell.
Might as well hit another lick--
I'm not tired of this shit.
I'm gone lie and steal, take what in me was killed.
Fuck a Jesus, I'm the resurrected,
that nigga temptress the grief in Momma's heart, causing conflict in her psyche.
It's me,
easily identifiable, I'm liable to reek all kinds of havoc.
My paradigm is crime waves and dope sprees,
extracurricular sex and green leaves.
Please Leave Me Alone,
I did this shit on my own.
Now the mental separation that’s penetrating my being is beating me,
it's beating me
it's being me!

by Genesis

This poem is dear to me as it was initially written and performed for a group of chemically dependent women whom I'd encountered while on an internship at a chemical treatment facility. I owe all inspiration to them.

Special thanks to Yasmin Coleman and Marcus Harris for having a wonderful show!

Again, click APOOO below to vote (for Darnetta a.k.a. Genesis) and please feel free to pass along the word! You can copy the link in your browser and paste it into an email OR you can use the email feature provided by Blogger.

APOOO

By all means....

2008-04-26T11:35:00.001-07:00

By all means, I'm no expert on parenting. I can't even claim that I'm really good at it. Shoot, I have my own problems with my hormonal teen, artsy eight year old, and a two-year old who uses 'ignorant' so much I find myself thinking of him when someone says the word. But I do know what I know, and I know that I think a lot parents go about steering their children in the wrong directions.

For example, summertime is approaching and parents are scrambling to find camps for their children. The parents I've encountered are foremost interested in getting their kids out of the home so they can continue working regular hours and get a much needed break from parentdom. No real harm in that, right? Not too much, but there is harm because half of them are sending their kids away to places the children are not interested in attending. The harm comes in if the brainy 10 year-old isn't very interested in horseback riding. Why not send him/her to a science camp or someplace his/her natural (or acquired) talents could be enhanced? It would surely make for a more enriching experience for him/her and money well spent for the parent(s).

Now I'm not saying allow your kids to do what they want to do instead of what's best for them. I'm saying that I don't think it's a bad idea to develop their strengths in areas that truly interest them. My daughter likes boys and drawing. So I'm always buying her drawing paper and pencils and encouraging her to draw the 'features' she likes in boys. Or even abstract portrayals of what she calls love. Of course, we deal with the rest of the boy issue in another way (mental note: buy more tylenol), but I'm encouraging the talent and hopefully, she'll have a masterpiece in someone's museum one day...

Gotta go. The artsy eight year old has tap and ballet in about an hour. It's funny, while I was pregnant with him, he danced in my belly any time music was played. See...

Now if anybody can tell me what to do with a very vocal, beyond active toddler, I'm all ears!

Next time: poetry

Stay peace and foster their strengths

Genesis

Woman's Freedom Cry

2008-04-19T08:09:00.000-07:00

Comment | Copy This

(click the player to listen as you read)

Woman's Freedom Cry

I am a woman
which means sometimes I'll blow shit outta proportion
and
according to you
try to control all that you do

I am a woman
which means that I'm semi-sensitive
giving in to situations
meant to live in this world
black faced
laced with lies and undeveloped cries
only to be told it's not lady-like to have my own opinion
and I'm sitting in a state of paranoia
trying to figure out who I have to take care of
myself excluded
eluded by television and radio
that tells me the ratio of black women to success
is 1 in 1000
and I'm providing housing to the next three generations

I have temptations too
to run
to leave
to bleach my skin lily white for a fair fight
to run
to leave
to straighten, dye, and fry my hair to blend in
winning stares from all men alike
but no
I fight a black woman's fight

I am a woman
which means that no man could ever understand my struggle
I must hold him and the world
yet deny myself
my wealth placed in what I could do for another
but this other has no obligation to me
He doesn't sweat my sweat
hell, he barely rubs my feet
but he's the first to laugh
under my demise and defeat
He's the first to stare
care enough to say I told you so
and turn his back on what nurtured his soul

This shit is getting real old

I am a woman
which means my anger doesn't come from being black
it comes from my brothas sitting on their black asses
and when the situation arise
refuse to take my side
refuse to understand sacrifice
rather lace up some weed
than help provide for his seed
rather run and drink with his boys
than be annoyed by my whining behind
you still expect me to be a strong woman...

That I am
because I've learned that I've long earned my spot in heaven
and regardless of what you might do
ultimately you live for you
so I gotta live for me
and if that means leaving your ass hungry a couple days out the week
cool
if that means making you wash your own clothes
cool
cause, brothas it's time
it's time for me to shine
to let my nappy fro grow
and not worry about your fingers getting caught in my tangles
to walk around in wood carved bangles
and clothes that are comfortable
to burn my bras
and let nature take its course
to divorce myself from self-sacrifice
and roll the die of life...twice
unlearn what I've been miseducated about
and shout at the top of my lungs

I AM A WOMAN

and let it be known...

By: D.J. Frazier
7.14.2000

yEs

2008-04-03T19:31:00.000-07:00

Comment | Copy This

She slowly removes her 5T jeans

while he coaches away her innocence

She tells him yes when her eyes open wide

and never breaks her stare

she wonders why he has wrinkles on his hands

There is no capacity for her to understand how she is capturing mental stills that will later invade her sanity

When she finally realizes it’s not right,

it’s too late

And when he places his hands over her flat chest

He feels no wrong

He feels new, special… wanted

He even feels truth

She feels something indescribable

But ‘something’ none-the-less

That something makes her want her mother to put him in time-out

Though she does not know why

With arms above her head, she said yes when she allows him to remove her shirt

When the pastel, pink fabric hit the floor

The deed is done and she can’t back out

Especially since he promised her they’d watch Dora the Explorer after they finish his ‘game’

Saying yes when she steps out of her Wednesday embroidered panties

reeking of youth

and the need for protection,

he holds her baby-fat body close to him

and whispers into her ear

causing her to chuckle at his knock-knock joke

All the while he wonders why ‘this one’ had been a hard catch

He’s sick and he needs company

In his misery

By: D.J. Frazier

Mamas taught their kids to beware of strangers. Mamas need to teach their kids to beware of everyone. Children are usually sexually abused by people they know. Do some research, but with keen eyes and an open mind, you can spot the onset of the cycle an abuser uses. Pay particularly close to people who seem to always surround themselves with children. Pay attention to the manners in which they touch your children. There is a grooming process where the perps will touch children often enough (on the shoulder, arm, spinal area, etc.) so they will become comfortable with the 'feel'. To an adult and depending on the environment, such gestures are often disregarded.

Remember, these people will be where kids are; parks, baseball games, back yard bbq's, restaurants catered to children, daycare centers (yes), etc. Who doesn't hug kids? Who doesn't rub a child's back when they've fallen and hurt themselves? How many times have we seen images of Little League coaches with their hands planted on a child's shoulder while speaking to them?

Once they are satisfied with the child's reaction, they test the limits and will graduate to things like placing their hands on the child's knees, or other areas, that are not frequently touched by people other than themselves. The child may feel some sense of wrong, but they trust this person...most times, so do the parents. The grooming period lasts until the child, the parents, and the community, are comfortable enough with seeing Mr/Mrs/Ms XYZ play with, supervise, teach, etc. children.

This is just a smidgen of the cycle. The description above is typical of a certain type of perp. These individuals are usually sexually abusing kids for years.

I didn't plan this post like this. I just wanted to share a lil poetry, but something made me continue to write. I feel that we are a 'fast' world. A world where we see child sexual abuse as an act and not a process. While I'm not denying it's an act, I'm more aware of it being a process as well. Hopefully some ONE will see it this way, too.

Do some research, share links, comments, and this message:

http://www.darkness2light.org/
Confronting child sexual abuse with courage

http://www.stopcsa.org/aboutcsa.cfm
Stop the Silence: Stop Child Sexual Abuse

http://www.aacap.org/page.ww?name=Child+Sexual+Abuse&section=Facts+for+Families
The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry on child sexual abuse

Those are good starts and have helpful resources.

Stay peace,

Genesis

[un]Phenomenal Women

2008-03-28T20:36:00.000-07:00

Talking Loud…saying nothing

There she was

…souped up face

…knock off threads

…chain store acrylics

Stuntin’ throw back shades

A huge façade

A common mirage

Created to catch you slippin’

Tripped up from surface beauty (shell shock),

you failed to see her insides brewing multiple pots of

…coping mechanisms

…negative self images

…defeat

…depression

…life lessons

Taught her worth was measured

by the girth of her hips

…the sway of her spine

…the size of her onion

Blessed with an abundance of pigmentation

Consistently underestimated…she’s even contemplated bleaching creams a time or three

She be talking loud and saying nothing

She be saying nothing just talking loud

She be proud…of the wrong things

The obvious Indian in her family that loosely coils her hair instead of kinks it

Yet she thinks it looks better under the latest lace-front the media encourages her to buy

And though she rocks perfect plaits beneath its weft, she’d never be brave enough to let her soul glow

She be proud…of the wrong things

Talking loud…about the wrong things

Negotiating food stamp favors to look good shaking what her momma gave her

Spittin’ venomous lyrics to soda-pop dealers for rides in pimped whips with 22 inch kicks

Be talking loud over bass rattling plastic covered windows

Be talking loud enough to echo through the boarded up homes consuming her hood

Be talking loud over sirens

…baby wails

…ringing cells

…even over the 80 year old lady that provides shelter for her baby’s daddy for free

But she just talking loud

…and saying nothing

D.J. Frazier

03.28.08

My little slice of heaven

2008-02-20T19:51:00.000-08:00

Thank God for my little slice of heaven today. I was able to see the lunar eclipse this evening. Here are pics. Some you may have to squint to see...lol Enjoy!

I shot this photo in black and white

This is a shot in natural color. Isn't nearly as beautiful as it is with ones own eyes.

Yes, that dot is the moon...lol

That's my definition of peace...

geneSis...

(I meant to do that *smile*)

Short Change... Ladies First

2008-02-06T17:25:00.000-08:00

I listened to the Michael Baisden show today and an extremely interesting illusion I had long not thought about... resurfaced Now, I could profess that the reason I had forgotten was due to it not directly affecting me daily... it would be true... but I dare not write that =(wink)=

Sexism is very ugly... any type of ism is ugly. Even that little tingle you feel about certain subjects means you carry an ism with you... and to deny it, would be to lie... and that's worse than ugly... that's fugly (for my hood challenged folk, that's f-ing ugly... I would go ahead and curse but I'm not trying to have a black eye in behind a seven letter word *Hi Mommy*).

What's fuglier is a man obtaining a position just because he is male.

What's more fuglier than that... is a well-qualified man obtaining a position just because he is male... and for said well- qualified man to believe he obtained that position because he was... umm... well-qualified.

Then... running neck-and-neck with the more fuglier example would be... a well-qualified man obtaining a position over a well-qualified woman because he is male... and for both to think it was fair play...

Yeah, some of that went over you all's heads, didn't it? Okay, maybe not... but WOMEN... when you hear or see sexism in action... do something about it. Brothas... it would be nice if you chimed in too... we need back up! Even if what you do is bring more awareness to it... it's needed....

It's needed because ism's are more undercover now. Our children need it... their children need it.

No one is going to discriminate you, at least not someone SMART, openly and obviously... they'll do something as sneaky as white men voting for Obama because they'd rather have a Black male leader than a female leader...

Yeah, that was a small portion of a big thing Baisden discussed on his show... but I'm not saying much more about it... support a brotha by visiting his website...

Now, I'm by no means a feminist... I'm more of a realist... but I am a Woman and I can't help but want Long Change... for-a-change

Here, I pay homage to Sojourner Truth in her speech "Ain't I a Woman"

Women's Convention, Akron, Ohio
Delivered 1851

Well, children, where there is so much racket there must be something out of kilter. I think that 'twixt the negroes of the South and the women at the North, all talking about rights, the white men will be in a fix pretty soon. But what's all this here talking about?

That man over there says that women need to be helped into carriages, and lifted over ditches, and to have the best place everywhere. Nobody ever helps me into carriages, or over mud-puddles, or gives me any best place! And ain't I a woman? Look at me! Look at my arm! I have ploughed and planted, and gathered into barns, and no man could head me! And ain't I a woman? I could work as much and eat as much as a man—when I could get it—and bear the lash as well! And ain't I a woman? I have borne thirteen children, and seen most all sold off to slavery, and when I cried out with my mother's grief, none but Jesus heard me! And ain't I a woman?

Then they talk about this thing in the head; what's this they call it? [member of audience whispers, “intellect”] That's it, honey. What's that got to do with women's rights or negroes' rights? If my cup won't hold but a pint, and yours holds a quart, wouldn't you be mean not to let me have my little half measure full?

Then that little man in black there, he says women can't have as much rights as men, 'cause Christ wasn't a woman! Where did your Christ come from? Where did your Christ come from? From God and a woman! Man had nothing to do with Him.

If the first woman God ever made was strong enough to turn the world upside down all alone, these women together ought to be able to turn it back, and get it right side up again! And now they is asking to do it, the men better let them.

Obliged to you for hearing me, and now old Sojourner ain't got nothing more to say.

pic: www.kyphilom.com/www/truth.html

speech:www.infoplease.com

Short Change... AA Facts For the Shortest Month of the Year (02.05.08)

2008-02-04T15:58:00.000-08:00

I mentioned on Feb. 1, 2008 that Lucy Terry was the first known AA poet. Here is the only poem that still survives as none of her writings were formally published. Born in Africa around 1730, it is unknown how she became literate.

BARS FIGHT

Seventeen hundred forty-six
The Indians did in ambush lay
Some very valiant men to slay
The names of whom I'll not leave out
Samuel Allen like a hero fout
And though he was so brave and bold
His face no more shall we behold.
Eleazer Hawks was killed outright
Before he had time to fight
Before he did the Indians see
Was shot and killed immediately.
Oliver Amsden he was slain
Which caused his friends much grief and pain.
Samuel Amsden they found dead
Not many rods off from his head.
Adonijah Gillet we do hear

Did lose his life which was so dear.
John Saddler fled across the water
And so escaped the dreadful slaughter.
Eunice Allen see the Indians comeing
And hoped to save herself by running
And had not her petticoats stopt her

The awful creatures had not cotched her
And tommyhawked her on the head
And left her on the ground for dead.
Young Samuel Allen, Oh! lack a-day
Was taken and carried to Canada.

For more information on Lucy Terry click here

Pic courtesy of www.projo.com

Short Change... AA Facts For the Shortest Month of the Year (02.04.08)

2008-02-02T09:20:00.001-08:00

This is a wonderful quiz. Please enjoy and let me know your thoughts (and score)

Quoting Greatness

Short Change... AA Facts For the Shortest Month of the Year (02.03.08)

2008-02-02T09:04:00.000-08:00

On this day, in 1870, we were given the right to vote...

AMENDMENT XV

(The proposed amendment was sent to the states Feb. 27, 1869, by the Fortieth Congress. It was ratified Feb. 3, 1870.)

SECTION 1

[Right of certain citizens to vote established.]

The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of race, color, or previous condition of servitude.

pic: http://www.laits.utexas.edu
info: www.infoplease.com

Short Change... AA Facts For the Shortest Month of the Year (02.02.08)

2008-02-01T05:21:00.001-08:00

On July 31, 1966, Stokely Carmichael, the newly appointed Chairman of the Student Non-Violent Coordinating Committee (SNCC), describes black power to a mostly African American audience at Cobo Auditorium in Detroit. Part of the address appears below.

I maintain that every civil rights bill in this country was passed for white people, not for black people. For example, I am black. I know that. I also know that while I am black I am a human being. Therefore I have the right to go into any public place. White people don't know that. Every time I tried to go into a public place they stopped me. So some boys had to write a bill to tell that white man, "He's a human being; don't stop him." That bill was for the white man, not for me. I knew I could vote all the time and that it wasn't a privilege but my right. Every time I tried I was shot, killed or jailed, beaten or economically deprived. So somebody had to write a bill to tell white people, "When a black man comes to vote, don't bother him." That bill was for white people. I know I can live anyplace I want to live. It is white people across this country who are incapable o fallowing me to live where I want. You need a civil rights bill, not me. The failure of the civil rights bill isn't because of Black Power or because of the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee or because of the rebellions that are occurring in the major cities. That failure is due to the white's incapacity to deal with their own problems inside their own communities. And so in a sense we must ask, How is it that black people move? And what do we do? But the question in a much greater sense is, How can white people who are the majority, and who are responsible for making democracy work, make it work? They have never made democracy work, be it inside the United States, Vietnam, South Africa, the Philippines, South America, Puerto Rico, or wherever America has been. We not only condemn the country for what it has done internally, but we must condemn it for what it does externally. We see this country trying to rule the world, and someone must stand up and start articulating that this country is not God, and that it cannot rule the world.

Sources: http://www.infoplease.com/t/hist/black-power/
Picture from: BlackPast.org

Short Change... AA Facts For the Shortest Month of the Year (02.01.08)

2008-01-30T21:00:00.000-08:00

Here are African American FIRSTS for February 1st

Mayor of a major city (Cleveland...u knew I'd represent)

Carl Stokes

President of the Harvard Law Review
Barack Obama

(prophesy...he'll also be the first AA President of the US)

Inventor of blood banks

Dr. Charles Drew

Poet

Lucy Terry

RANDOM AA FACT:

Number of states in which blacks are the largest minority group. These states are Alabama, Arkansas, Delaware, Georgia, Illinois, Indiana, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maryland, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, New York, North Carolina, Ohio, Pennsylvania, South Carolina, Tennessee, Virginia, West Virginia, and Wisconsin. (Note: Minorities are part of a group other than single-race non-Hispanic white.)

Check Yo Self Thursday (1.31.08)

2008-01-30T14:45:00.000-08:00

You know... I had to check myself because I realized that I start shit at the WRONG time...yup, I admit it... I do it quite frequently.

Case in point... at the stroke of midnight, on my birthday, I woke my husband up to ask him about something I had no business looking at in the first place... yup, I admit that too... but curiosity is a wild thing and my impulsiveness... is even worse. Needless to say, for my birthday... I got cussed out at 7 in the morning... I wasn't mad about it... I deserved it... but it didn't ruin my day... plus I was born at 4:32 p.m. so it wasn't officially my day... yet

So I'm going to practice patience... and listen to that lil bitty voice that tells me to think before I speak or think before I wake-up a black man over some b.s. that really isn't important.

Damn... I'm checking myself HARD... cause I hurt his feelings and interrupted his sleep... causing him to be late to work... lesson learned.

What did you have to check this week?

Birth of the Day Blog

2008-01-29T18:36:00.000-08:00

GO HEAD... IT'S MY BURFDAY
GONNA PARTY CAUSE IT'S MY BURFDAY
I'M GONE SIP BACARDI (or some alcoholic beverage) CAUSE IT'S MY BURFDAY

Yup, I made it to my 32nd year of existence. Can't thank anybody but God for that one... I had some fun with my sister-in-laws over the weekend (for my burfday), endured millions of jokes about turning 35, even though it ain't true... but I laughed anyway... hey who cares... I've got another year under my belt...

With the hours quickly approaching my big day (Jan. 30), I've thought a lot about me. I've thought about what defines me... actually been doing this for a couple of days now... yesterday's thoughts made me go ahead and do what my mom termed the BC (Big Chop)... for all that didn't know, I had relaxed my hair for what I thought was the greater good... better employment opportunities in Tha Land where jobs are continually diminishing... yesterday, that hair became a memory and should be resting in the landfill by tomorrow afternoon (trash day). I mulled over the mounds of books my mom had on natural hair care and I missed that nappy part of me. That's the REAL me. I grabbed my clippers (which just happened to be at her house) and gave her bathroom sink and floor a healthy dose of chemically altered hair. I went from hair that fell nicely around my shoulders to having hair that made my son say 'put on some earrings mommy 'cause you look like a boy'... and I love it! It was my burfday present... to myself. Putting me back in perspective...and... my sister-in-laws are gonna kill me... but I warned them...

I finished reading Uncle Tom's Children by Richard Wright... the edition republished in 1965... it was one of the most engrossing reads I've EVER had... I slept on him cause I don't like the little small books with the small print. But something about the gorgeous black man with only a half visible face (and some on-looker standing behind him) made me want to know his secrets... and to do that, I had to read the book. See... covers DO matter. Now I have to pick up the rest. I read one of his other books, but that was long ago and I still have it... gotta check it out again... cause I missed something... definitely missed something...

So far I've read 11 books this year... that's a first for me... made it a point to get a lot of reading done... got reading goals this year... that's a first for me too...

My 6 year old son received the 'Most Outstanding Student' award today... mama doing good
My 14 year old daughter is writing a book... mama doing 'REAL' good
and my 2 year old rubbed my head and said 'I wike ur hairrr mommeee'... mama done hit the jackpot

Age has a way of making you live in moments... relish them... revel in them... desire more of them. It has a way of making you understand just how precious each second is... a way of making you stop and think or stop... and live. I don't know how it does it... it just does. Gone are the days of wasting time (though some would think blogging was just that...oh how little do they understand) for the sake of wasting time... I get mad when mine is wasted... how about you?

Even thought about death lately... not my own but of those I love... who still live. I thought about my reactions to some of those who have gone on and why I responded the way I had... it's simple... regret....

If you live and love the people you say you do... and each moment with them is fully spent WITH them... laughing... crying... listening... talking... being silent... then there is no room for regret.

When people make their transition...we grieve... naturally... and move on

When people make their transition and we grieve... with regrets (I wish I wouldn't have argued as much, I wish I was there when they needed to talk, I wish I would have just been able to say goodbye) we need to check our selfishness and try not to make the same mistake... again...

The how is individual... my how is above... each moment with them is fully spent WITH them... laughing... crying... listening... talking... being silent... knowing I've spent whatever time have with them well and to the best of my ability would help me heal... if they pass before I do

So while most do what they do on their birthdays... I'm going to grab a bottle of something, sit my black behind on my black couch and think some more about me... the me that I am, the me that I want to be to others, and the me that I have yet to see...

stay peace

genesis

So Funk'dified....

2008-01-25T05:16:00.001-08:00

Funky moods are all around threatening to take you out of your joyous you... your normal you. I'm no different. I've been in a funky mood for a couple of days. Not wanting to do anything, talk to anyone, and definitely not think about anything. My funk turns me into a vegetable. I let evil forces overwhelm my body without protest. I hate that. But yesterday, when the funk woke me up with a headache that Tylenol couldn't cure, I made it a point to 'get up, get out, cut the bullshit out'... as OutKast said...

The first thing I did was take a shower... so what it was 4 in the evening. I knew taking a shower and putting on some of my frankincense and myrrh body oil was gonna make me feel soooo good. Not only do I enjoy the smell, the hubby likes it; claiming I smell like incense. Not only that, I showered with a soap I made with peppermint oil. I knew those two things would take me up out of my funk. I'm one for awakening the senses. It's just something about smells and music that make me believe I can conquer the world... so of course I played Teena Marie's Out On A Limb... I was almost cured. Now I needed to please my eyes. I read Nice Dreads by Lonnice B. Bonner... I'm going to loc... starting in March...

So funk doesn't have to last forever. And those of us that know something is wrong but don't know what it is... need to find an immediate way to make ourselves feel better... or risk losing time you can never recapture....

What do you do to get outta your funk? I'd love to know... maybe I can adapt another technique for myself and vice versa.

stay peace
genesis

Check Yo Self Thursday

2008-01-24T11:16:00.002-08:00

Hey All!

I'm checking myself because I need to listen more. Someone wise told me I had two ears and a mouth for a reason; to listen twice as much as I speak... yeah, I'm hard headed. That lil aquarian trait the makes me do my own thing without regard for directions or warnings or whatevers. So I'm checking myself for not listening to people like I should. And there is no particular situation, just in general. I'm sure if I had listened to someone then I'd have a specific example...

What do you need to check yourself about this week?

Check Yo' Self...

2008-01-17T07:58:00.000-08:00

I've finally done it... I've found a day that I can theme! Waiting so long for the inspiration, waiting so patiently for a topic... and it's here.

I've decided to coin my Thursday blogs 'Check Yo' Self Thursdays'... Here, I plan to post something I've had to check myself about over the week, with the hopes of changing my perspective or whatever it is I need to change. It's a day of introspection... a day where you can reveal that you've done something wrong, or had think about or re-think something... reposition your morals, etc. etc...

I'm checking mySELF because... (should be how you introduce it... every Thursday... my only requirement... then feel free to comment on others checking themSELVES)

OKAY? Okay...

I'm checking myself because the way I think, at times, keeps me accepting a certain level of separatism yet bitching about it when it isn't so... confused? Let a sista break it down...

I went in Half-Price Book Stores the other day. It was one I had never been in, needless to say my mom and I traveled to East Hell to find it AFTER we left Borders... When I got there, I scoured the labels on EVERY shelf in that humongous store and became quite perturbed when there wasn't a section for AA fiction. They had AA studies but I wasn't looking to study... I wanted me some feel good something... maybe even some gritty something... and there was NO section in the store for me to peruse for it...

I thought about going up to the desk to ask, until I passed a Terry McMillan book in the general fiction section. So I started to look at the titles instead of the labels and what I found was that in this East Hell HPBS we (AA) were integrated! Here is where my problem was...

While I was grateful for the act, I found it HARD to find an AA book to read. It wasn't that hard when I went to other HPBS and walked my lazy behind over to the AA section (all three shelves of it) and found a few titles that piqued my interest... ALL the while complaining about why we have a section anyway... But in this store, I was upset because they didn't have an (easy) section for me to walk to and grab something from... what the hell?

Do you know what type of mental anguish that caused me. How could I be so... so... conflicting? I had to take my own criticism like a big girl though... I had to dust off my OLD thought process and really check my black behind. Growing up a little... maybe a lot... but when I checked out, I had to right my 'wrong'... I let the clerk know that I was very impressed about AA titles being mixed with all the 'other' titles...

Then I got my bubble busted. The very nice blond told me, in a little I'm-uncomfortable voice that they received so little of it, it was best to just mix it in...

Ohh how I deflated... I THOUGHT it was because our fiction was just as good and there was no need to separate. I THOUGHT it was a sales tactic... after all it made ME purchase one of my oldie-but-goodies (The Canterbury Tales)...

A while later I realized it didn't matter WHY they chose to integrate... the MOST important thing was why I was so bothered yet elated about it!

I had to check myself y'all...

YOUR TURN!

stay peace

Genesis

Prison Mentality Permeating Reality

2008-01-14T18:42:00.000-08:00

Created January of last year...

Prison Mentality Permeating Reality

Steel smacks steel as I dream
of a quiet place
where names were created by letters not numbers
summers spent 'out in the yard'
bore a different meaning
back when time raced and
I chased it
Now sitting around wasting it
has taken a substantial amount of my autobiography
and made my life irrelevant

Organized like the perfect planner
mindless banter with knuckle-heads
and bones slapping tables
Better times were when I was able
to eat when I wanted to eat
play when I wanted to play
I could move on or I could stay
but this residence, is my consequence
an it's almost time for lights out
midnight shouts
as the screams of souls un-living
yearn for the yesteryear

I've tried to be free mentally
it only works as long as you’re
not being sought to be shanked
booked and yanked by those
supposing to protect you
'I'm gone break yo neck fool'
echoes in eardrums that have long
left society

I left from behind bars
baring emotional scars
that give me night sweats
and jitterbugs
watching shadows
breathing shallow
I had to go back

It's easier to deal with enemies when you know who they are....

1.2007 Genesis

No tolerance for dumb things!

2008-01-14T05:41:00.000-08:00

When I woke up this morning my husband informed me that Lebron James was going to jail... I said 'HUNH' not Broni (that's my lil nick name for him...lol I name all the basketball players). Then he told me the brotha was speeding... okay... so? Then he told me he was doing over 100 mph in a 65 mph zone... I said 'lock his behind up!' While we both know he won't go to jail over this (maybe pay a fine and do some community service), I just can't understand why he 'chose' to drive so fast... I just have no tolerance for dumb things...

Then poor Marion J, lawd have mercy on her and her babies, is wrapped up in check fraud... can't understand it... don't know how she got in that mess, but I'm sure it had to do with a man... leading her into temptation... But why? I'm disappointed... check fraud? I'm clueless... but I have no tolerance for dumb things... No comment on the steroids... even though that's stupid too.

I couldn't be a judge... I'd lock everybody up. Say something stupid... you'd get three to five... Think something stupid (I'm telepathic... no usually it's written all over peoples faces)... you'd get five to ten... Act stupid... you'd get LIFE!

My momma taught me to THINK... she also taught me when to listen and when to speak (a few back-handed slaps drove the message well!) I carry those messages like a schizophrenic hearing voices... they follow me... they guide me... Now I question, would money... fame make them hard to listen to? Or is it we have expectations for celebrities and when they mess up, even if one time, we have to punish them harshly for their mistake? Ion know... all I do know is I have no tolerance for dumb things and as sad as it may be, these two people have been knocked down a notch on my celebrity scale. Their images, for me, will forever be tarnished by their inability to THINK!

stay peace

Genesis

I Go On and On, On and On

2008-01-07T15:16:00.000-08:00

Ohh, my, my, my
I'm feelin' high
My money's gone
I'm all alone
Too much 2 see, the world keeps turnin'
Oh what a day, what a day, what a day

Peace & blessins' manifest
With every lesson learned
If yo knowledge were yo wealth
Then it would B well earned
If we were made in His image
Then call us by our names
Most intellects do not B-lieve in God
But their fear us just the same.

On & On and On & On
My cipher keeps movin' like a rollin' stone
I go On & On and On & On
Alright till the break of dawn
On & On and On & On
My cipher keeps movin' like a rollin' stone
On & On and On & On
Got damnit I'ma sing my song

I connected my mp3 player to my stereo and my husband observed that I had exactly 8 songs by Erykah Badu on that device. I said "Hell yeah, she's one of my top 5", he shook his head... not wanting me to go into another LONG explanation of why she deserves such a standing. The above lyrics to On & On is the 'short' version of why she sits with me on my throne. Now, I didn't plan on making a blog about why she's important to me and I'm still not going to (gotcha!). But I will say that her music (lyrics), along with Jill Scott, Floetry, Meshelle Ndgellocello (ohh, I butchered her last name), Musiq Soulchild (and all my other neosoul favs) stay in heavy rotation in my home.

Sometimes when I don't understand my man, I listen to Teach Me by Musiq...

I was told the true definition of a man was to never cry
Work till your tired (yeah) got to provide (yeah)
Always be the rock for my fam, protect them by all means
(and give you the things that you need, baby)
Our relationship is (suffering) trying to give you (what I never had)
You say I don't know to love you baby
Well I say show me the way
I keep my feelings (deep inside I)
Shadow them (with my pride eye)
I'm trying desperately baby just work with me

Teach me how to love
Show me the way to surrender my heart, girl I'm so lost
Teach me how to love
How I can get my emotions involved
Teach me, show me how to love
Show me the way to surrender my heart, girl I'm lost
Teach me how to love
How I can get my emotions involved
Teach me, how to love

and like magic... I understand...

They validate my struggles... makes the blow easier to deal with when you know you're not unique in your problems. They celebrate the very things I celebrate... Black love, family, solidarity, individuality, peace, freedom, awareness etc. Somehow I feel... represented and feeling so, I must show appreciation by exposing those around me to their feel-good-ness.

Remember when your parents played all that blues... and you didn't understand WHY they liked that slow, depressing... umm... music? I remember, and to this day, can hear some older man singing about a man named 'Uncle Bud' who, to me, was perverse and embarrassing. My opinion wasn't important at the time... since I was a kid... but now... I understand. Though I don't know the message in the song, I'm sure the music was symbolic of something... something they were going through, something they felt... That something is what propelled my parents to play it... just as that 'something' makes me press repeat on my stereo... until he kids start singing along... then... well...

So... what songs/artists make you Go On & On?

Don't You Give Up (An Ode to Sequence and Life)

2007-12-24T07:48:00.001-08:00

Don't You Give Up (An Ode to Sequence and Life)

Don't you give up… a-keep going, a-keep going, a-keep going ahh

I said get up, get up, get up, get up, get up
Get up, get up, get up, get up
Sit back down

Right on up, we're gonna funk you right on up

Sequence said it best

Testing us to get up and shake what our mommas gave us

They raised us and made us want more

Of something

Something that we didn't understand back then

Something we thought beyond our reach back then and

Something we still strive for

Again and again, man

Hey you sitting over there

You betta get up outta yo chair

And work your body down

No time to funk around

Cause we've got work to do

can't let small things

Stand between you and greatness

Debating between failure and defeat

Sitting with negativity begging at your feet

Overcoming the overcame

And still singing slave ship spirituals

You better ask somebody upwardly mobile

Holding success in their hearts

Working smarter for the almighty dollar

Saying prayers and counting blessings

While you're at home still trying to learn old lessons, but

Don't you give up… a-keep going, a-keep going, a-keep going ahh

One of my sistas told me

I was an untapped resource

My own worst enemy

Blinded by the bling

And chasing dreams from my living room sofa

Another of my sistas told me

I stood for things I didn't know of

Told me being down only meant I had one way to go

Showed me how to cultivate the motivation

By changing my radio station

And the revelation was endless

Ring-ding-dong
Ring a ding-ding-ding-dong
Ring-ding-dong
Ring a ding-ding-ding-dong

Then it happened

I found that `IT'

That `go tell it on the mountain' mentality

Fallacy had me believing the unbelievable

Now I know TRUTH

Sound the alarm

`cause it's a new day and I'm living it MY way

Palms together, sweaty, like I'm praying for the first time

Eyes wide open, like I'm seeing for the first time

Ignoring that knock on my door… for the first time

Evil wants to gain entrance

Despair wants to have breakfast and

Sin wants to wrestle… for old time's sake

But I don't have a moment for them… anymore

Don't want their company… anymore

Glory is delighting in my abode and I enjoy basking in its brilliance

I love its warm and humbling feeling

And I invite you to indulge

I invite you to partake in its awakening sensation

Invite you in for some `real' conversation

All you have to do is…

Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up
Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up
Get up, get up, get up

But you can't sit back down…ahh

12.24.07 Genesis

Can't Let You Take Me Away...

2007-12-22T09:20:00.000-08:00

Christmas is a happy and sad time for all... well all the people that I know anyway.
Trying to come up with money to buy gifts for others... putting off paying bills just to see someone smile... I'm guilty of it too

But what I hadn't anticipated was that someone I love dearly trying to take me away from all I enjoy...
Yeah
I love spending time with my parents... there are so few people who can say that (actually they find it DISTURBING that I talk to and visit my parents EVERY SINGLE day... hmmm)
I love reading... I've been told I read too much (though I think THAT'S impossible)
I love writing... I've been told I write too much (though I think THAT'S insane)
I love talking to my friends on the phone... I've been told I talk to them too much (though when we talk, they can't handle my realism and concreteness... say what you mean and mean what you say)

I know it's a cry for attention and I must be honest... always have been, always will be
I'm self-absorbed and they knew that upon meeting me 10 years ago
Not so self-absorbed that I'm selfish... just self-absorbed in a way that makes me a highly motivated person... because my kids need a better future... and it depends on the baby steps I'm taking now

But Aquarians have been known to be unsympathetic and aloof... I'm guilty... especially if you try to take ME away... I back away from you... feeding you morsels of myself, just enough to make your mouth water... just enough to let you know I still love and care for you but I won't indulge in your toxicity. That's just me... and when you become too poisonous, I disappear.

So maybe I'll read a little less... maybe, I'll write one less paragraph but I won't do much more than that. I can't do much more than that. What will become of ME... the ME that I love, the ME that I enjoy. I've sacrificed all that I can and sadly for them, I'm not willing to sacrifice much more.

I saw a saying in a store yesterday:

Don't spend all of your time preparing for the future, that you forget to live

It was meant for me, I know that. So I grabbed my WWJD coin from my pocket and rubbed it, then thanked Him. When I got home, I passed the coin on to someone I know who needs it more than me... maybe they'll do some self-reflection and realize that what I do makes me happy and in turn should make them happy... maybe they'll find a hobby that makes them just as happy... maybe they'll stop being so selfish and realize that all I do is for the love of them, my kids, and my parents but also for the love of myself. Because, heaven forbid, I lose them all tomorrow, there will aways be a book to read and a book to write that will ease my pain... and make me smile.

Stay peace

genesis

I Anxiously Await 2008

2007-12-18T05:08:00.000-08:00

So many lessons learned in 2007. Some would say they were bad events, I just call them challenges. All of the struggling, I know for sure, is for the good that is to come in 2008. The one thing I learned, and preached but had not practiced, is planning. I fell short. Planning a few things and leaving others to umm... destiny, when they shouldn't have be left there. I know better now.

Things I've prayed for have come to fruition... not in the way I wanted them to come... but they're here and I must embrace them... though differently, but embrace them still the same. Just to give you an example of what I mean... I prayed for more time to devote to writing... then I was laid off, in June... and I wrote and still write. I prayed to be able to go back to school... graduate school... found out that I could apply to the city for funding... yes free money... but it didn't cover graduate studies... got the money and attended a technical school... am now a PC Specialist... finished the 14 week program in 4 weeks... cause I'm a nerd and serious about my shit (Thanks Ms. Badu, that's the best line ever!).

But you see, I'm not scared of a little struggling or even a lot of it. Cause then things are right, they are REAL right and I can't accept the good without a little of the other.

Stay peace and focused
genesis

2007 NaNoWriMo Winner!

2007-11-30T12:01:00.000-08:00

Yeah... I did it! There is no other feeling like finishing something that is grueling, challenging, and to some... crazy.

I completed my 50K words last night and I feel so liberated. The intensity of what I feel is better than it was when I participated in NaNoWriMo the first time; 2006. I knew what I was going into this time and still made it out... ALIVE. A little sleep deprived but I'm living, and breathing, and thanking the high heavens that it is now over!

Yes, you read correctly... I am ELATED that it is over!!! It is a hard task to add another item on my daily to-do list when November rolls around. Not to mention the -itis I get because of all the Thanksgiving food and birthday cake I eat each year at this time. Then old man winter rolls his head my way making me less excited about most things.

Well... here is my thingy to make it official

Now I have 'heard' some interesting things while I was holed up next to my computer. Don't kill me but I haven't had time to research them but they are never-the-less, to me, research worthy.

On ESPN this week it was said that 1 out of every 2 men will develop some form of cancer.

Now there are 3 males in my household, my husband and two sons, so at least one of them will develop it
Between mine and my mother's household there are six males, so half of them will develop cancer
Definitely have to look into this further

I heard on the news last night that Cleveland is the 9th most depressed city in the month of December YET we have more mental health resources then most large cities

Could be this cold ass weather we have
Could be the sucky job market
As someone on the show said... could be The Browns (who happen to be doing very well at this time)
Could also be the lack of money to pay for mental health services (Hint! Hint!)

A friend of mine told me that Lady Bugs emit a smell when they feel threatened.

I've never smelled on but I get them alot during this time of the year. They happen to like my bathroom color. Seems as though they find white appealing or like the smell of my kids boo- boo

I found out that there is a such thing as NaNoEdMo that takes place in March (2008) where authors sign up to log in 50 hours of editing for the month

Are you effing crazy?
I'm still editing my manuscript from 2006 NaNoWriMo
Chris Baty needs to whip y'all's asses for that, IMO... lol

One more interesting thing I found out was that my mom knows the lyrics to Crank That by Soulja Boy...hmmm and she knows the other versions of the song like Crank That Batman, Crank That Superman, etc. Hell, I didn't even know about those songs...

Real hip-hop, please rescue me...

Okay, just wanted to have a little fun since I don't have to be permanently attached to MS Word until November 2008! Stay peace and see you tomorrow... yes, I'm back BABY!

Doing it with a bang...

2007-10-23T11:20:00.000-07:00

I didn't, and still don't, plan to chronicle my school tales each day, but today was just as weird as getting kicked out of class yesterday....

So I finished my applications early and decided to adjust the computer settings back to how they were before I started. Background plain (check) Screen saver: default (check)

I looked into my textbook, you know, to read ahead and...

ZZZZZZAAAAAPPPPPPP!

I jumped from the noise and noticed my computer screen was blank. Then I glanced at the tower and the power light wasn't on....then I smelled smoke....

Oh Hell NAW!!!

I jumped up to inform my instructor, who was working with another student. I tried to be patient, but the burning smell began to get stronger, so I tapped him on the shoulder and alerted him of the issue.

He jumps up, like Super Man, minus the S on his chest, removes all of the cables and high tails it out the door with the computer......it sat in the rain....wow

He then explained that he'd been there 13 years and nothing like that had ever happened. Well...you know what they say about firsts...I'm a trailblazer baby...lol

Needless to say...despite blowing up their computer, I completed my first application (extremely fast) and was given my certificate. He explained how excited he was to have a student go through the application so fast and how he had 'connections' with publishing companies in Cleveland. Even told me he would give them a call to see if they are looking for someone and if not, would I be allowed to do an internship there....BINGO

We discussed my educational goals a little further then he dared me to test out of a few applications; which I did...tested out of beginner and intermediate word but I opted to still go through the intermediate application...for my own benefit. Could have flew straight to advanced, but as it looks now, I'm slated to finish a month and a half ahead of schedule...but I'd still need to attend to obtain the hours. He gave me options for that issue as well...

Ahhh...this chapter, by far, has been the most dramatic....but I like it like that.

Stay peace

genesis

I got kicked outta class today....

2007-10-22T18:14:00.000-07:00

First day of school....

had to be there at 9 a.m. arrived at 9 a.m.---this wasn't good for me, I like being a lil bit early....but okay

Had a mini-orientation...again. Read the rules, signed a few documents, etc., etc., etc.,

Just when everyone started sounding like the teacher from Charlie Brown, I heard the most angelic voice say, "We've been waiting on you!" To look around, like she wasn't referring to me, would have been stupid...so I didn't. I smiled and said, "Really? That's pretty cool..."

I didn't have to ask why...already knew why...I told y'all I was self-absorbed and my plans were brilliant. See, my agenda preceded my attendance at the school. They knew I had clear cut goals and my follow-up and follow-through is awesome...in most areas ;) I'm not perfect...all the time...or even most of the time...but so far, I've been perfect to them because I'm not the usual there. I'm quite abnormal. I have standards and have no qualms about setting them....

My training is being funded through some program I don't even know...it doesn't matter (to me anyway) But in order to obtain the scholarship, I had to jump a few hurdles, roll over a few times, and wag my tail to a T-Pain song. Then I had to get up and do it over again...and I did it flawlessly....effortlessly, without complaint, even smiled about having to do it...it's called 'a process'....'a requirement'...patience

After hearing about how fast I'd breeze through the program, I started my computer applications with ease...nothing hard about the day at all...until 12:30, the instructor kind of slid in a comment about leaving at 1:30

SCREEEEECHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

I wasn't planning on leaving until 2...still had one application to finish...after all, I'm trying to complete the whole program early...that's how I do it, you know...

I look at the clock----) 1:15

I tap a few more keys ---) 1:25

I go through a few more pages of things I already know, but don't mind refreshing ----) 1:37

I hear the word KARMA, then look around and I'm the only student left in the classroom...cool with me, I have business to attend to.

The instructor mumbled a few words, so I removed my headphones and asked him to please repeat what he said. This is how it went:

Instructor (looking at the clock): Most people don't take a lunch, so they cut out early
Me: Really? I'm not going to do anything but go home and get on the computer anyway
Instructor: Oh, but I really wanted to leave at 1:30
Me: O.k. So you can't leave until I leave?
Instructor: Well, no. I don't want to bother any of the other instructors cause they have things to do...

(like I don't have things to do)

Me: Oh...let me finish this one part, it'll take a couple of seconds. Is that cool?
Instructor (looking at watch again): That's fine.
Me: You want me to turn the computer off?
Instructor: yeah

I gather my things and walked out of the door, thinking....what the hell was that? Why should I have to leave because he wants to leave? What kind of bush*t is this...it wasn't in the rules that I could leave whenever I wanted, so why should I have to leave when someone else wants me to? The time says 9-2...Funny thing is the instructor doesn't arrive until 10 which means I'm there an entire hour without him...but I can't be there, at the end of the day, for 30 minutes...without him....

This is why I'm so confused at times ... I mean...it's only Monday and I done already got kicked outta class...

stay peace

genesis

The first chapter in my new life....

2007-10-21T20:46:00.000-07:00

I had a conversation with a woman I consider my best friend...always have considered her that...and she told me some things I already knew about myself...but I felt better about it being validated

I always come to a stand still...in life
Where I need to readjust my thoughts, my feelings, my everyday happenings...my life. I've done so many things and have had so many experiences, but lack of 'real' knowledge has always had me starting things without finishing them, or without finishing them before I start something...new. I can't help it...I'm flighty.

Tomorrow is somewhat different for me though. Tomorrow I start school...tomorrow, I start working toward a well thought out goal...hmmmm....that's extremely new to me. I'm whimsical. I'm carefree. I'm self-absorbed...most times. But this path that I've chosen to take...is freaking 'brilliant' to me. I did a lot of self evaluation; decided what it was I loved to do, how to get some letters behind my name for it, and get paid to have the type of fun I really want to have.

I see it working...this time. I see a brighter future for my family and I. I see more happiness beyond the horizon...and I'm stoked!

It all started with the question: What do you want to be when you grow up?

Three kids and a husband later, I just now realized....I've grown up. I don't have time for idle dreams. I wanted to be a lawyer, until I participated in my first mock trial. At that point, I realized I didn't like to argue if it wasn't to defend myself...NEXT...

I then wanted to be a hairstylist. I went to school, even paid for my managers course. Yes, I'm a Licensed Managing Cosmetologist...who doesn't do hair anymore. Decided I couldn't work in someone else's salon...people are devious and don't care...if it isn't their own....NEXT

I went back to the drawing board....yup, you guessed it...COLLEGE...
After all, I had a full scholarship, that I earned while in the 6th grade, to THE Ohio State University...that I passed on to raise my child...I'm sorta like a...a...genius (okay nerd but so flipping what). I finished with a degree in Social Work which was a no brainer because it was something I was good at, right? Very, very WRONG....
I'm extremely good at working with people...but the field itself, leaves a LOT to be desired, like hmmmm....MONEY.....NEXT

I even tried being a housewife...twice...ain't my cup of java...NEXT

So I've dabbled in quite a bit and most of my experiences I've really enjoyed. Well, maybe that's a lie. The lessons I've learned from my experiences is what I enjoy. I reflect on what I've done, where I've been, and who I've met and it all really does come full circle.

Success is subjective. I'm very successful...but there is so much more success to be enjoyed, why not take full advantage of it? I'm not the type of person who becomes complacent....I'm not the type of person who just accepts...

While my actions may appear erratic, irrational, way out there in the atmosphere somewhere...they are purposeful to me.

This next step will set me up to be...the very me I aspire to be...

So heres to first chapters....I'm looking forward to many more of them....

stay peace

genesis

2nd Time Around...

2007-10-19T07:50:00.000-07:00

This is the second time around for me...

Last year, November 1, 2006, I participated in National Novel Writer's Month (NaNoWriMo) and successfully crossed the finish line with a little over 50,000 words. It was one of the easiest things I've ever did in my life, in hindsight.

This years challenge...is somewhat different...somewhat more difficult...and I'm somewhat nervous about it.

I've always accepted the fact that the more you know, the more you grow...which may have been a chant embedded in my brain from the good ole days of grade school...sorta like the 'just say no' campaign.... I've also come into an even better depiction of the saying courtesy of Mama Deep (and I might add that she's extremely DEEP) acVernon Menchan--who says you know better so you must do better--to paraphrase....

But as I've grown, I've learned that the more I know...sometimes hinders me
Sometimes makes me forget that simplicity works best
Sometimes makes me over-think things that need not be over-thought....ya feel me?

I understand about turning the inner editor off...but can I do it? Last year, I didn't have to, because I didn't have an inner editor...at the time. But through my experience as a reviewer for A Place Of Our Own (APOOO)--www.apooo.org-- I've become more aware of my editing issues and slightly aware of how to change them. And through my experience with novel writing, I've learned that because I write good poetry, doesn't mean I can write good books--even though I'm learning--and that I must study...which I do daily...to become a great and respected author.

Yes, this years challenge, is actually a challenge for me...but I welcome it with an open heart and open arms....though I don't doubt that I'll complete it....I can't deny that I'm nervous, and become even more nervous as it gets closer to November 1st!

If you want more information about NaNoWriMo, please visit www.nanowrimo.org and don't forget to add me as a buddy (poeticgenesis) if you sign up.

For a glimpse of my first experience, check out the interview with Emanuel Carpenter on BlogginginBlack.com (----click there

Stay peace

genesis

I'm the itch...you can't scratch...

2007-10-15T21:25:00.000-07:00

Did you happen to check out the pictures of the worms on my sidebar? Yeah...those...

I hate worms, but I captured the first picture on my camera phone. I figured this must've been one of those 'had-to-be-there' kind of things to see. I knew I would share it...at some point.

To take the picture...made me itch...again....I hate worms...as much as I hate clowns (but that's another blog).

I started thinking about life while watching the worms mate. I started to see them as a symbol of how I know I make others feel...on purpose...sometimes.

I make them itch
getting close enough to the soul...the truth
to irritate them
but I do it...on purpose

I make people itch because I know they can do better...I just want to let them know I know...you follow me?

I may say something on the sly--just enough to illicit a raised eyebrow. Or I may discuss how I feel about something seemingly unrelated (but totally related) to them. Or I will just come out and say it...for all of my literal people out there...just depends on who the person is, (my perception of) their character defects, and what they may be struggling with...

BUT regardless of how I tell them...

I want the itch to propel them to action. I want it to bother them so much they scratch it...but not enough to make it go away.

I want the itch to be a constant reminder that someone cares enough to rub them the wrong way...purposefully...

I want it to make them uncomfortable and motivated to find a cure for it...for themselves.

I don't know about you, but I choose to surround myself with greatness and I can't expect any less of you...if you are my friend...you'll understand...one day

And if you've rubbed me, lovingly, the wrong way...THANKS! I probably wouldn't be who I am today had I not, at least, scratched.

stay peace

genesis

Dreams...

2007-10-15T07:18:00.000-07:00

I've learned that all dreams are important. I've also learned that the smallest dreams usually mean the most. While riding, shotgun, to take my husband to work, we talked about our dreams of being millionaires...a la lottery.

See, we only need 8 million dollars...8 million dollars and our entire family will be set...for life

We divied (hood term for divided) up the earnings...

$100,000 to our 6 siblings

a home and car for our parents

college fund for our 7 (yes 7) children

a newly constructed home for us, including a separate playhouse for our entertainment

our business...the fliest night club in the the country and my computer graphic design company

Whatever is left...is for investment and savings...

I was happy.
At that moment, I was a millionaire. I was worry free, for the time being. Then we arrived at his place of employment...he got out of the car...and so did my dream, temporarily.

I couldn't wait to put this down on paper...or blog...cause while dreaming and researching how dreams become reality...I've learned that you MUST write down your goals...you MUST set objectives to reach them...and while I really don't plan to become a millionaire via the lottery (that part is my husband's dream), I DO plan to have millions!

Stay peace

genesis

Breaking News!

2007-10-10T12:13:00.000-07:00

When I was about 12, I remember a woman, in her late 20's, coming to my home...to fight me. She knocked on my mother's front door and when I saw her, I asked her to wait a second by putting my index finger in the air....

Two minutes later I returned to the front door...with a shotgun...(true story)

Today, a 14 year old student took two guns to school and opened fire. There were four people shot...two teachers...two students and possibly one dead...the shooter. They say it may be from a self-inflicted wound. I say it's because no one was there to protect him...from himself.

Violence is taking over my city. Can I blame it on the fact that we are the poorest city in the country...maybe Can I blame it on teachers no longer willing to teach...maybe Can I blame it on teen pregnancy...probably Can I blame it on parents...definitely!

I've watch violence become the new limelight. I've watched kids sell drugs to their friend's parents and their own siblings, but tell their parents to cop from their dudes.

I've walked into schools and witnessed armed security guards taking 'high' students to the front door and unleashing them into the world..alone...where were his parents? Working...maybe At home asleep...maybe Picking him up from school...definitely not!

Is it me, or have we chosen to let law enforcement officials, teachers, and drug dealers parent our children? Have we decided that work supersedes parenting? Have we decided to be blind to what the hell is going on around us because it isn't our problem?

Cleveland, wake the hell up!

Mayor Jackson...you'll be hearing from me Parents...I hope you decide to do your job before violence hits your home...and you become a subject for my blog.

Times have changed since I pulled a piece of steel larger than me on someone...in hindsight, I had no respect for life

Now...it's seems that no one does...especially our youth!

I don't believe we have a future...with kids like these....

stay peace...if that's possible

genesis

p.s.

as I finished this...it was confirmed the 14 year old committed suicide...young white male described as being overall unhappy...may he rest in peace

Mission Accomplished...just call me Jack Bauer!

2007-10-09T09:26:00.000-07:00

I can't even call it today...so maybe I'll talk about yesterday...

Yesterday, I purchased my son a grill...yup a grill...these, to be exact

aren't they cute on him?

NOT!!

An argument, between my husband and I, became heated when I decided my son would have these. Why, you ask.... Because he didn't want the youngster to have them and I did. His reason...because his brother will want a pair as well My reason...it is a toy and my son wanted it. I also explained to him how I will never base my decision to purchase something for one of my kids by how I think one of the other ones may react.

I left it at that...for him anyway

Now, on to my son...

These were the most hideous things I've ever seen, in my life. I can't stand 'real' grills and definitely can't stand fake ones. I knew once my son put them in his mouth, he'd see how ridiculous they look and chuck 'em in the toy box with his other 'non-cool' toys. My hope is for the $1.99 I spent for these, I will have given my son 'my take' on how grills look--silly

I will have, at least to some small degree, altered his perception of these 'hip' grills. When I showed him the picture of himself donning his grill, he thought it was the most hilarious thing....I asked him if he looked like the rappers...

He said 'yes'

*patting self on the back*

Mission accomplished!

stay peace

genesis

p.s. just for arguments sake, my daughter hated them=would never be caught dead in them SEE

my youngest has grills of his own...SEE

FLAVOR COMPLEX (poem)

2007-10-08T07:12:00.000-07:00

FLAVOR COMPLEX

could be my chocolate ability
to liquefy and
meticulously consumes my victim
that causes you to think of me
as you sleep

could be the way your caramel dissolves
just enough to produce moisture
that leaves residuals between
my thighs
from thoughts of you

creating eyelid flutters in anticipation
of
sweet scents seeping through pores
flesh penetrating flesh
hershey hole devouring milky, honey-yellow caramel
forming puddles in places
yet to be tasted

i'm not afraid
of your caramel cracking
bleeding orgasmic testimony onto
my chocolate covered sheets
where we explored each others flavors

where the firmness
of you
reacted positively to the pliability
of me

where we mingled and moaned ourselves
into a culmination of sheer
oral pleasures

leaving a grin so secretive
it tells on itself

even before it begins
I'm wondering
when will the warmth of your
caramel-from the friction we create-
lead me to melt all over you
again

stay peace ----)Genesis

The mind of creative creatures.... (poem)

2007-10-06T16:07:00.000-07:00

Magic In My Mind

when i slip clauses before pauses
or totally refuse to adhere to rules of written words
i find authentic freedom...
i release strings of letters...neatly pocketed

i uproot comma's, place them in slingshots
and hurl them into the atmosphere to create colorful rainbows that
brighten children's paths toward creative outlet and appreciation

i create images from deja vu
places my stories have been...fighting to be realized
giving me droplets of moments
frozen in time...some time...magic in my mind

i have no answer to where I get 'it' from
the ability to create isn't something I asked for
it's something that happens when I place pen to pad,
when I get mad,
when I'm glad, and
sadness catapults me to deny myself sleep
for the sake of a fucking word....

i am everything I'm am with this...this thing I can't describe
this thing that makes me write in-stores,
in-notebooks...I haven't paid for...yet
or tear out the pages, remove the ragged edges,
and stuff THE next literary masterpiece in my purse...close to my i.d.

this madness that makes me zone out sometimes;
mentally watching scenarios play,
wondering if something I'm
reading,
watching,
or listening to
is raping my mind; ejaculating subliminal messages rendering my brain
incompetent and beyond my control...which appears to be working

i have no idea what makes me
write and love to write,
write to read and read to love,
love to write about what i read,
and read to learn about what I love

it's impossible to explain what happens
without appearing mentally ill
but it's similar to you explaining, to me,
why you can't do it--
what happens that makes you unable to be creative?
from my perspective, I can't see how THAT is even possible...

there is no formula, rhyme, or reason
to my being able to make things up
it's really magic...in my mind

creator: God
told through: genesis

Knowing Yourself

2007-10-05T05:29:00.000-07:00

I don't like for grown men to wear shirts with numbers on them. I believe that type of clothing is for children and young teens. As a matter of fact, I find it rather turn-offish.

I also don't like for my food to touch, the mispronunciation of words, people who talk just to talk, and commas...I don't know, it's just me...

It's very important that you learn about yourself. It's essential if you plan to become an author. It takes a while but much effort needs to be placed on this feat; even more effort than it would take to develop a good storyline.

I'm a whimsical poetess. I write complete poems at the drop of a hat and take all of five minutes to complete a piece. I tried the same thing in novel writing and, unfortunately for me, I'm not a whimsical novel writer...

I've learned that I need structure. I need to know my characters before I know my story. I need to outline plots and subplots, asl (age, sex, location for the non-internet savvy), I need to have actual pictures or dolls or cartoon characters...to refer to when I'm describing my character's traits.

I also learned that I'm not the most fashionable person so I tend to stay away from placing my characters in name brand clothing or using current terms like cougar (older women who date younger men), alls-I'm-saying-is, nameen, etc...

I know that writing, for me, is a journey. I'm in it for the long haul so it's important that I continue to get intimate with myself so that others can enjoy me; so that others can feel the sincerity in whatever they read that I've written.

The all mighty dollar looks good in my purse but my name on the shelf with the likes of Gwendolyn Brooks, Ralph Waldo Emerson, William Shakespeare, Paul Lawrence Dunbar, James Arthur Baldwin, Nikki Giovanni, bell hooks etc., means SO much more to me... This goal makes knowing myself mandatory!

I've only been novel writing for a year and there is much more in store for me!

What were some things you learned about yourself when you started writing? Writing evolves as we mature. What ways have your materials matured?

Stay peace

Things that make you say hmmmm....

2007-10-03T10:11:00.000-07:00

I was listening to the Michael Baisden show yesterday and learned a very valuable lesson.

There are 'life' things that we naturally teach our children...that goes without explaining. But how often do you possess knowledge that you don't share with your children that could potentially keep them out of harms way?

An example used on the show was children talking to police officers. I've never thought to teach my children 'not' to answer an officers questions. Why not? Because they're officers and the magnitude of their positions causes most of us to teach our youngin's that the POLICE are good people; they are your friends...although we know that's different, at times.

We don't teach them 'not' to answer their questions because we want to believe that most are intrinsically good. The law calls for officers not to question minors without their parents being present, yet we know that most officers lay the questions on thick and quick because they know children don't want to be in trouble (well most don't), especially not with the PO-PO...so they answer and most of it is honest. This is definitely AGAINST the law...but do your children know that? I doubt it.

I'm sharing in the vision of awareness, especially when the law is concerned. While I have encouraged my children to look up to law enforcement officers, which in my hood is hard to reinforce, I have also stolen a little of reality away from them by this action. Children implicate themselves the most so we must learn, right now, how to teach them the right way...as soon as we find out what the right way is.

I had a discussion with my daughter, who hadn't heard the show, and she had so many questions about not answering her 'friends' (cops). I answered all of them the best that I could but we never lost focus on the message....

Teach your children 'not' to answer questions from the police without your presence. It's against the law and if they had anything to do with a crime in question, answering without your presence can land them with a rap sheet.

Upon discussing this with my five-year-old son, he emphatically stated "I hate the po-po"....but that's a whole 'nother discussion

Stay peace,

Genesis

Writing....

2007-10-02T07:31:00.000-07:00

As a writer, I find it difficult to keep my mental folders in order. There is so much information available that I often become a victim of information overload and board a broken down bus at least once a week.

Board a broken down bus...what the hell is that, you ask....

It's when I have so much information to process that I stop EVERYTHING...I stop writing, I stop reading, I stop being stimulated by my environment...I even stop being a mommy, daughter, sister, friend, and wife when I board the bus. It's a must if I plan to remain sane!

Every now and again it's okay to stop the presses. I'd like to challenge that it's a MUST...at least when you are a writer. The time frame in which one chooses to take a time out differs, but the goal remains the same.

Don't get it twisted though...just because you take a day off from playing your many roles, writer included, doesn't mean that you do nothing...

It means that you give your mind some time to sort out all of the information you've gathered. Give your mind time to properly organize and file the contents of your mental folders, trash what's not needed, and make notes regarding information you need to gather in the future.

I return to 'business as usual' a little more refreshed and inspired. My senses are more keen and I feel I can conquer another week without falling apart. Information is so empowering and stifling, simultaneously....

This process happens in life, in general, as well. Maybe not as often, but it happens...

How often do you board a broken down bus?

Stay peace

Theorems....on THAT level (Part II)

2007-09-23T07:06:00.000-07:00

Honest Isn’t the Best Policy…it’s the only policy!

Have you ever started a statement with ‘honestly…’ If so…STOP! You are about to lie! Why would you even imply that you are dishonest? Remember the old saying:

…it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it

I’d like to take a look at ‘its not what you say’…Well, what you ‘had not’ said was that you were untruthful…at some point…in life… It also ‘implies’ that you don’t believe your friend wants the truth, even though they asked for your honest opinion. You just wanted to be sure…right? Yeah, unh hunh…

Believe it or not, the thoughts and ideas that people don’t speak about can impact their entire statements overall message. While this isn’t an ‘aha’ moment in a philosophical school of thought, its announcement needs to be reignited. It’s cliché-ness (yes, I made that up) has overrun the true wisdom behind it.

Advancing to my interpretation of ‘it’s how you say it’ ... hopefully you haven’t told Sista-girl the truth about those too small pants…yet.

If it’s how you say it, then how do you say it?

Now, I’m not going to sit here and tell you to find a ‘nice’ way to tell your friend she’s fat. I ‘want’ you to tell her she’s fat. Why? Because it’s the truth! The truth will set you…and her bulges…free. Keep in mind this theorem is a bit longer than others. It’s going to take a little more convincing than usual…right? Right.

So…back to your friend, the need to be honest, and using the f word. Lets look at your friend first. She’s overweight, restricting the circulation in her waist, and asking for your ‘honest’ opinion on her apparel choice….

How do you say it…honestly?

Humor always works if one person laughs, even if that person is you. Laughter has a way of easing tension when you have to tell a hard truth. Most psychiatrists and psychologist will tell you this defense mechanism is used to divert the intent of the message. I say, so what! You’re telling her something that is uncomfortable for you to say, so what’s wrong with a little mental soothing? Not a thing! This is my proposal…

Snicker and say ‘suck your fat in, if you can’t, I think you should wear these (while offering her another choice of pant)…I like them better anyway…

Your friend is not going to be hurt…why? Because she knows she’s fat. She wakes up every morning in her body. You are only validating her thoughts. The same thoughts she had when she tried to zip her pants. It may seem cold when written but with ‘honesty’ in your voice, she’ll know you aren’t being malicious.

If she is truly your friend, not only would you tell her she’s fat, you’d care about her health and offer your assistance. Be it a walk…workout…together…or even becoming educated on the consequences of being overweight. Friends care enough about each other to remain truthful and open, right?

By saying what needs to be said, the way it should be said will place value in your opinions. Your being straight forward AND helpful to your friend will create a bond that is truthful and wholesome.

So, slap a fat friend on the ass and tell them if they passed the jiggle test…if it doesn’t jiggle a little, it’s too small or they are too fat…

Theorem: Say exactly what needs to be said, it’s better that way…

Introduction to the Theorems...on THAT level

2007-09-22T13:54:00.000-07:00

Introduction to the Theorems

The musings of a distorted mind are beyond fascinating. It takes a sincere, open individual to appreciate its’ knowledge. It takes an individual in tune with their mental and physical capacities to incorporate these theorems into their lives. There is a difference between these two types of people…

The sincere, open person will read the theorems, validate its point for the sake of it being someone’s view and place it on a shelf for weekly dusting…wasting away. The person in tune with themselves and know their truths, are those that will research and practice the theorems, tweak and apply them to their lives. They will also recommend them to friends. These are the people I want to read ‘Theorems’.

Because of the recommendation, the friends are bound to have a discussion. Dissecting each piece and finding out more about themselves in the process. During the debate, which I am sure it will turn into, each side will want to be right. Being right involves validation of fact. ‘Theorems’ may not be that ‘fact’, but I’m sure it will initiate the dialogue that will find the ‘fact’. That’s my sole purpose.

So grab a fat friend for a book buddy and check your conventional way of thinking at the gate!

Stop Lying!

Have you ever thought it best not to say anything if it were negative? Has someone ever asked you for your ‘honest’ opinion and you still lied?

Yes…telling your girl her pants were fine when you saw how the zipper refused to stay…zipped, is a lie. So what she’s a little overweight! Why would you allow her to walk around exposed and ultimately embarrassed? To protect her feelings? Lets be real…you were protecting your feelings…inadequate feelings of confirming your friend’s struggle with her weight. But…you lied. Denying powerful emotions (energy…in motion--Tyra rocks!) to guide the situation where it needs to go.

Look at it like this…Sista-girl knows she’s thick but first impressions are sometimes the only impressions.

Theorem: Think about it…and stop lying!

SHE DANCES LIKE LOVE (poem)

2007-09-03T19:33:00.000-07:00

SHE DANCES LIKE LOVE

I watched you sway

I watched you close your eyes…and dream

dreams full of hearts and love and love and…

I watched him walk away…defeated

mistreating this obvious show

that was truly for his eyes and I watched more…

waiting....wondering why you continued to dance like…love
when he no longer watches but continues to walk away...

It's that persistence...

It's that walk by faith mentality and hope

it's dope and at times…painful

but girl you danced…you danced harder...
and
you
sweat more and…

the desire grew in your eyes as you opened them to realize…he'd left

left you…left your efforts…left the love you laid on the floor

you turned once more
and a smile caught your eye…

then your dance began again.....

The House Of Mistakes: A Novel

2007-09-03T19:23:00.000-07:00

Prologue

The house was old with memories. It smelled of stale bread baked with love. As I walked through its corridors, I saw flashes of grandmother staring me down.

“Chile, didn’t I tell you girls don’t wear pants.”

“But grandma, girls do wear pants now-a-days.”

“Well, not in this here house they don’t. Gone an’ put on that nice skirt I bought you from Sears last week.”

As I walked to the closet that use to house coats, I thought of all the dinner parties and family meetings held in grandma’s home. When I opened the door, I couldn’t understand why I had half expected some of her things to still be hanging there.

“Damn,” I whispered. “Grandma been gone for a while now... I’m going crazy.”

I closed the closet and leaned against the door. My mind wandered to the time I was sent to live with her because my mother couldn’t handle me. It was so hard for her. I was a frustrated teen who didn’t understand that what I was going through was normal. Guilt started to consume me as I recalled the times I’d screamed and cursed her out, for no good reason.

“You ain’t grown Michelle!”

“I ain’t trying to hear what you saying! You just want me to live a lonely life like you! I ain’t having it!”

I was a walking time bomb then. My momma died clutching her chest. A heart attack, they say, but I know it was because of me. She died of a broken heart... I’d disappointed her so much.

Walking up the creaking, wooden stairs, I thought of all the fun I had sliding down the banister as a child. My dad would scream at me; telling me that I was going to hurt myself one day. He didn’t know it at the time, but he had sealed the deal on my future.

“Girl, get your ass of that damn banister before you break your leg or something. You gone get one of them bony ass ankles caught, I tell ya.”

I heard his voice each step I took.

Reaching the top, I bypassed my uncle’s old room. He died in his bed, of cancer, and the room was never reopened. I knew it would be full of his things, mainly his memories, and I wasn’t ready to face that... yet. He had stolen my innocence. Placed his penis in my hands at the tender age of 8 and by the time I was 12, he was full fledge fucking me. Was it so wrong if I enjoyed it? It’s been over ten years and I still feel him touching me when I'm asleep.

Opening the door farthest from the steps, I removed cobwebs that threatened to grant my entrance.

“This will have to do,” I mouthed, looking around the room.

It was where grandma did her sewing. It still had fabric remnants and a few tables scattered throughout. I pulled a chair from the corner and sat it in the middle of the floor. I wanted to take in its totality at once. I grabbed a thin piece of fabric and placed the homemade tourniquet around my forearm then took a deep breath. I checked the syringe for air bubbles before inserting it. As the needle punctured my skin, the memories and voices slowly faded away...temporarily.

Genesis is.....(poem)

2007-09-01T10:47:00.000-07:00

I was on my page on shelfari.com (it's on my blogroll) and realized that the reason I had never completed the 'about me' section because I just couldn't......

I know that people find talking about themselves easy, but I don't. Nor do I find it fun. Surprising hunh? Shouldn't be.

I've told many people about things I like and don't like, or what I would or wouldn't do...and I know you're asking 'well those things are about you, right' but, in essence, it's not. Not for me anyway....

Take a look...I created this in my little 'about me' section. Sitting for 5 minutes, staring at a blank template....then words began to cross the screen.....

I am the beginning....

A few someones I've birthed
baby fresh whimpers
new angelical vessels....His vessels
glory they be!

I am the beginning....

the spark before flame
the idea preceding action
the conflict of males
yet the necessity of life
procreation--that is

I am the harborer of secrets
my children, and sista-friends, and cousins tell
I am the healer of scrapes and bumps and heartbreaks and bruised egos
I am the devoted daughter of a King and Queen
--anxiously awaiting my time on the throne yet will mourn it's arrival, simultaneously.....

I am the beginning, and conversely the ending, of everything

Five minutes later, I had partially defined myself and could have gone on but....well, it just stopped

.....so I assumed it was over.

So this blog today, is a little lesson....about me

Ask me specific questions.....if you ask me to tell you about myself and don't receive a response, check out some of my web pages...you'd know 'something' about me...if you read them....then we'll have the makings of a good conversation

If you call me and I don't answer....for days...I'm probably feel 'me' out at that moment--it may not be a good day and I may hate the world at that time...so you wouldn't want to talk to me anyway....I'm kinda saving you some grief too

I don't really care what people say but I watch what they do....that's how I determine their character and their position in my life

That's just a little Saturday knowledge on me. The jets and mess are practicing for the air show and it's driving my baby crazy...."scared of airplaaaanes," he cries. So mothering calls, I have to comfort him. Have a nice, long weekend! REALLY relax for a change.

Stay peace

Genesis

Baseball Season In The Hood

2007-08-16T17:27:00.001-07:00

This blog was inspired by The Bizarre JC Martin ----) Click here for her blog "Summertime Fun"

Life Lessons Realized

Baseball season meant the WORLD to me! My dad would bring out the old cleats; dusting and polishing them off like we did the mantle full of trophies he'd won playing the sport. Lacing them up carefully to make sure they still 'fit'. I don't remember exactly what he would say, but it was always funny. Although his serious, quiet statuesque demeanor would make you believe otherwise, he was really a gentle giant; until crossed.

After the cleats were finished, he'd send me or my brother to get his bat. I use to loathe searching for that bat. The search itself was fine but carrying it to him was my issue. I'd always complain about how 'ghetto' he was because he had drilled a hole into the handle of the bat, filled it with water and corked it. My thoughts were, 'we are always nigga-riggin' sh**'. None the less, when I found the bat, he'd begin his annual ritual of cleansing it too.

The cleats, the bat, and we are half way there. This is when I would start to get excited. The only thing left was to launder his uniform. Yes, the uniform that made my dad look like a 'real' athlete! I loved the way my father's smile warmed my heart while in his uniform. This seemed like the only time he smiled so wide and so full of excitement. I had grown to love seeing him that gleeful. My mom would reset some of the buttons, around his ever-growing belly, and make sure he had his calf-high socks to hide the fact that he had actually gained a few inches in height as well. Whomever said people shrink as they get older was a liar, or it could have been the socks had shrunk.....

Mommy would make sure we had a cooler for the adults and a cooler for the kids. No sense in buying pop and chips from the vendor at Thurgood Marshall when we could just bring our own, right? Right....

I watched my father run around the bases until one year he utilized a sub. My daddy would hit the ball and the sub, a guy quite a few years younger, would run the bases because his knees had gotten bad. It bothered me so much not to see MY daddy running those bases. Those runs gave me all the reason in the world to give my daddy another hug, another kiss. Those runs are what had my mother, who was a home maker, scrubbing his uniforms after each game. Without those runs, what was the point?

It wasn't until years later that I understood the point...

It wasn't about cleats. It wasn't about water-filled bats, uniforms, and coolers. It was about fellowshipping; camaraderie and mixing it with good ole fun. It was about making lasting friendships and enjoying family time. My childhood experiences there prepared me to understand that things change and we need to change with them. To understand that though the method changes, you can still attain desirable outcomes. The basic things we need when life deals us bad hands. The things people don't seem to have time for or can understand these days.

From the age of six until 16, I spent the majority of my time on baseball diamonds, in most of the cities in Ohio. In what I thought was following my dad, the baseball star, was really teaching me things that I wouldn't understand until now.

Last week, my husband announced that he would be joining a baseball team this season and I almost cried...

The baseball field wasn't the only place I learned lessons......more to come

Stay peace

genesis

CRY, OH LORD, OUR COUNTRY (poem)

2007-08-09T09:55:00.000-07:00

CRY, OH LORD, OUR COUNTRY

I stand with iron fist
pumping in air

CRY, OH LORD, OUR COUNTRY

tears of despair
trickle down cheeks of innocent children

WHAT ABOUT THEM?

what about the hunger of their minds,
attempting to understand?
man
almost blind and guilty by
being born
man

CRY, OH LORD, OUR COUNTRY

immune to nothing
they stand with shallow breaths
confused and misguided
or unguided
as we
man
strive and stride
without them

WHAT ABOUT THEM?

CRY, OH LORD, OUR COUNTRY

place guns in children’s hands
so they can defend themselves

WHY NOT?

we are so preoccupied with those
we think are spying on us
lying on us
mistrusting ourselves
digging our own
sleeper holes

WHAT ABOUT THEM?

selfishness taking over the wheel
leaving tire tracks on the children's back

CRY, OH LORD, OUR COUNTRY

they fight a losing battle
from the first wail they produce
from their mother's womb

crying, wailing, crying

hungering and thirsting
for the path
which WE have not laid

CRY

OH LORD

*May not be duplicated, in any form, without the expressed, written consent of the author

We've Got To Do Better: Hot Ghetto Mess....hmmm

2007-08-08T06:16:00.000-07:00

We did it again!

We, or rather BET, has found another way to perpetuate the media's take on ridiculousness! Even though Hot Ghetto Mess claims to lie under the pretenses of the slogan 'We've got to do better', it still serves as a vehicle to air and make fun of the less than desired folk; US.

Charlie Murphy (Eddie's brother)

It's just hard for me to accept that this show is actually an attempt to encourage people on how NOT to act. I find it purely entertaining. It's not family friendly, at all (unless you call seeing a crack head say 'I suck a little di** and smoke a little crack, family oriented). They mostly portray THE African American. I mean, really, they should have just coined a minstrel show!

The shows idea hails from the website www.hotghettomess.com where patrons of the site are asked to submit 'wild and crazy' videos/pictures. Now who, in their right mind....aww forget it.

My issue with the show is that I want them to be real. This isn't to discourage 'ghetto' behavior. It's a show meant to highlight some dumb shit people have done! So STOP badgering me over the head with 'WE'VE GOT TO DO BETTER' and make me laugh damnit!

The Storms of Our Lives (Cleveland Wake Up!)

2007-08-08T05:23:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I laid in my bed listening to the clap and clamor of the thunderstorm that was getting more serious by the minute. I checked the clock to see that it was 7:30 a.m. At 7:35 a.m., thunder shook my house and one by one, the kids started trickling to my bed.

Mmm.... I thought. This is going to be my CHANCE to sleep in! Get real...

Between the loudness of the storm and disturbed whining from my children, ALL hell was about to break loose. I turned the television to some idiotic kids station so that my children can be lulled by them only to have the damn power shut off temporarily, courtesy a la storm.

So I drag myself and my two youngest out of MY bed and head downstairs to the kitchen to make breakfast....cereal that is......

My life is great hunh! You bet your ass it is!

I'm lucky my kids love me the way they do. I'm lucky that they feel SAFE around me and seek me for that safety. Life outside of my house, this morning, wasn't so nice and they found comfort in mommy's arms....how about that!

All the while, I find out that there is a shortage of powder cocaine here, in Cleveland, Ohio! Well whoop-d-damn-doo! What about the other stuff that's in abundance? In a few articles I read, it appeared that someone wanted kudos for this feat. NOT! That's your damn job. Just as it is my job to ensure my children are healthy and safe.

Someone is missing the mark. We have too many crack heads strolling the streets, feigning. We have too many talented people who are unemployed. We have too many teachers who don't like their jobs. We have a SMOKING BAN! Something is VERY wrong with the whole city's sewer system, just look at this mess....

Yes, that's flooding! Cleveland flooded yesterday, as I held my scared children in my arms. Freeways were closed down and about 35 people had to be rescued from their cars....... See what happens when the city doesn't do work on it's streets. One particular brook (Doan, I believe) was suppose to have work done on it to prevent flooding, but it never got completed. The project ran over budget and they said 'Aww, to hell with it'. Even though one of our seasons is construction season! Yes we have winter, spring, summer, fall, and construction....

Cleveland needs to wake up! Our downtown is pretty but ridiculously expensive. The new bowling alley charges $35 an hour on weekends to bowl. The clubs have nothing but lingering thugs running around and half dressed chicken heads shaking their butts. The crime rate is soaring. Hell, even my house was robbed last year AND I know ALL the thugs! Loyalty is dead....

Well enough of my morning rants! I'm off to make breakfast, yes cereal, for my little ones.

I hear there will be another storm today.....

How Dare You Ask To Check My Credit.....

2007-08-07T15:58:00.000-07:00

How dare you ask to check my credit!

This is what goes through my mind every time I'm asked to 'sign-on-the-dotted-line" by a potential employer. I understand the mechanics of the entire situation but it still doesn't really make sense to me....

Employers want to check your credit so they can be sure your salary will cover your debt....
--I'm just so sure they are looking out for my best interest.

Employers want to judge your character by your ability to manage your debt.....
--AHA Houston, we have touch down! This is probably the closest to the truth we will get..

I don't understand how ANYONE can judge someone's character by snooping through a credit report. Just because I manage money badly, doesn't mean I don't have good character! Just because I couldn't get that bill paid, from five years ago, doesn't mean I'm not a hard worker. It doesn't mean I'm not trustworthy and deserving of a position in someone's company. It simply means that I'm NOT GOOD WITH MONEY thus MY NEED FOR THE JOB.

Not to mention, there are consequences for too many inquiries for one's credit report.

Don't get me wrong, I can see this practice as practical in some fields of work. Anything financially related, I would agree to employers wanting to see how their potential employee manages money. But, for the life of me, I can't see why any other business would need to.

Stick to the damn background checks and let's call it a day!